Ep.129 Raquel "Lionheart" Pa'aluhi-Canuto
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Unknown Speaker 0:40
Hey guys, welcome back to sex and violence with rebel girl presented by UFC fight pass the show that interviews top level MMA fighters and other experts in their fields about love, dating, romance and that all too taboo subject sex. I'm your host, Ashley, rebel girl Evans-Smith. Now let's talk about sex and violence.
Unknown Speaker 1:13
What's happening hot stuff? What is up on my naughty listeners? We're back in the studio. And okay, so we apologize for missing lax last week. DJ is all we thought he had the vid, the COVID buddies, he's all good. He just had a gnarly flu and now he's got a sinus infection. So DJs Oh, brown, brown brown right now feeling good. So anyway, like we're saying, Yeah, we're feeling feeling better film. Still feel no crappy. I'm looking at zombies. He's still feeling crappy. I hope you guys are feeling okay. It's the shitty winter months, you know, even though it's January is probably going to be you know, bad weather for a few more months. So it's take care of yourself out there, guys. You got the COVID and you just got the regular flu and whatnot. So, but other than that, I want to tell you guys a little bit about this weekend. It's gonna be fun. If you're in SoCal area, be sure to go by Los Angeles. It's called Rosewill studios in downtown LA. It is SOS nine, the pro team duels if you're into grappling, this is some of the highest level level of grappling out there. This one's really special because instead of just you know, a certain weight class all trying to get the, you know, prize money. We've got teams of three. So it's the pro team duels and 10th planet, Gracie, whatever, you know, the teams are, they're all competing for $3,000 as well as a women's I think either bantamweight or featherweight superfight. So that's exciting. I love watching the ladies, I'll be there hosting as well, if you want tickets to that go to at submission only series on Instagram or submission only series.com. That's a really fun event. It's actually in like a production studio. So it's not like in a gym. It's got a different vibe. There's an open bar, a really cool, just jujitsu community type of event there. So check that out. And then next weekend, if you guys are also in the SoCal or LA area, January 28 is up next fighting for Commerce Casino it's a very special collaboration event with bad meds, kill real people or stop bad meds is what it's called. Basically, it's a public service announcement, but they're bringing awareness to the fact that a lot of fake pharmaceutical drugs are out there being sold online and killing so many people in our communities. And I feel lucky to be working for an organization that is a part of something like that, that actually puts effort into, you know, our community and spreading, you know, awareness and a positive message. And so, actually www.safe.pharmacy.com is where you can go to check your prescriptions, it takes two seconds, put in your prescription, I'm not exactly sure the other details, I think it's you know, maybe the website that you got it and it can literally save a life and so on January 28, you're going to have up next fighting for and then a couple really cool things that they're actually going to be showcasing at the event as well. I'm going to be wearing a special leather jacket that's actually made by a local la artist, and we're going to be raffling that off. It's really cool leather jackets, got some studs and school artwork on the back and then raffling that off during the event and all that money will go to the event as well like the charity stop bad meds so just all around cool night if you want tickets to that that's up next fighting.com And you can check out their social media at up next fighting. And then finally guys, the day has come where I'm gonna get some stem cells in Colombia. How does I know I'm so excited. It's still about a week and a half away but I'm helping you guys. Because if you guys are avid listeners, and you listen to the show every week, you may be wondering where the fuck is sex and violence in February and March are probably taking about two, maybe three, but definitely two weeks off while I'm there getting poked and stabbed and recovering and whatnot. But fear not, we will be back with some amazing guests, I really want to talk about next week's guest, but it's such a good one to end off with, but I won't get ahead of myself. Yeah, that's it, guys, a couple little reminders, we're gonna end this chapter of, you know, my life with a bang, I'm going to be doing a lot of events, I'm going to be working really hard. And then when I come back from Colombia, it's fucking go time guys. If you guys have been a longtime listener, you know, I've been talking about this for so long years now, years, two and some change, which it's, it was frustrating for a minute, but then I finally just started trust the process. And now, it almost seems like Unreal, like holy shit, okay, like, I'm actually going to be back in in real fightcamp. Very soon, it's the light at the end of the tunnel, if you will. So stay tuned, guys, if you're a fan of me, as an athlete, not just a podcaster, I promise I'm gonna be bringing the fucking heat. I've never ever felt this positive. I've never had this much support in my life. I've never been this sober. Never just really done things the right way. And I'm excited, I don't even know what's going to happen. I know it's going to be awesome. I know that whatever I put out there, you know, inside the cage is going to be my best effort. And I've done a pretty good job while given a not so full effort, if you will. So now I'm just I'm really stoked. And instead of talking about it, I'm just going to show you guys so just keep watching everything that I've got going on, I promise it will be entertaining. If you guys want to support us in other ways, you can check out our website sex violence with rebel girl.com. Buying any merchandise on there really does help out. I'll also have an exclusive website. And that's called Ashley rebel girl.com. It is like only fans, but better. It's called Fan time. And it's just where all my exclusive content goes. That's a little too risky for Instagram and all the other social media platforms. And I am still definitely looking for an intern. I know a couple of you who sent me resumes and emails you reached back out following up, I just kind of wanted to wait until we got a few more applicants until I kind of did the interview process. So if you're interested in being an intern for the show, the duties would be simple. It would be helping book guests and basically like some creative ideas about some segments, and the research kind of like the legwork. If that sounds fun to you, please email us at sex and violence podcast@gmail.com. And you can always email us with other stuff too, like guest suggestions. If you want to sponsor the show. We love money. We love anyone who wants to support us. That's the email guys. And lastly, I tell you all the time, but it really does help us rate and review the show. It's a podcast, I know you're probably listening while you're driving or doing laundry or working out or whatever the hell you're doing. You don't have to do it right now. But you know, maybe later just give us a little follow on Apple or send this to somebody who you think might like it, because word of mouth still is the best marketing. So all right. Now let's talk to some of our amazing sponsors that make the show possible. Okay, guys, let me tell you about our newest sponsor of sex and violence podcast with rebel girl, EAA Tax Resolutions, they are professionals that will help with tax issues and bookkeeping. Whether you're looking to settle your tax debt for less than you owe, or have back taxes that you need to file, ie a Tax Resolutions can help you out. Don't believe me? Check out their YouTube channel, ie a Tax Resolutions where they show exactly how they've helped clients in the past save 1000s in taxes. Not only does EA Tax Resolutions help with tax issues, but with bookkeeping. Now, bookkeeping is commonly overlooked by small businesses, myself included as not being the most important however, this is very crucial come tax time. Instead of scrambling for receipts, all your information is organized and most importantly, accurate. So if you have a small business and you're looking for a bookkeeper, EA Tax Resolutions can help you out. And remember, if you want to learn more about EA Tax Resolutions, you can visit their YouTube channel, EA Tax Resolutions or call them at their 800 Number 1-800-245-0596. Again, one 802 450 or 596 or visit them at their website, ie a tax resolutions.com. Today's guest is an American Brazilian Jujitsu, grappler and mixed martial artist. The bantamweight fighter is a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu black belt and a sixth time no ghee World Champion, the Invicta FC veterans last fight was September 2020. The 32 year old was born in Waianae, Hawaii, and is of Hawaiian, Portuguese, Samoan, German and Irish descent. In 2016. She married Brazilian Jiu Jitsu blackbelt and world champion Hinako Canuto. Together they run hybrid jujitsu in Las Vegas. We talk about future cage goals, dad, a Hawaiian MMA legend. What's an economy shower, married after three months, Hawaiians mate for life like penguins, six year age difference pros and cons. Future family desires loves long eyelashes and long arms. A true love greencard marriage. Are we having sex or is this jujitsu and much more? Here's your guest Rock Hill Lionheart Paul Louis kanuto.
Unknown Speaker 11:38
All right, we're here with rock hell. Very excited. I was trying. We're trying to have you on the show last week, but we made it happen. Thank you so much for being flexible. How are you today?
Unknown Speaker 11:48
I'm good. How are you guys doing?
Unknown Speaker 11:50
It's a good day here. You know, DJ Zola is feeling a lot better. And yeah, I'm, I'm going to Columbia in two weeks. And Oh, nice. Yeah, actually, you and I were speaking before the podcast just now about some injuries that you might have. And for me, I'm going to get stem cells. And any any person I come into contact these days, like I asked them, I'm like, you know, have you you know, even researched stem cells? Because they can be pricey, but not a lot of people know about them. What What are your thoughts on stem cells?
Unknown Speaker 12:23
Well, my husband, my husband has been like, plagued by injuries last couple of years. So he's actually been doing a lot of research on that. And like the PRP stuff, yeah. And then especially like, with this recent injury that I have now, like, my gosh, I don't know how, like how much longer I can deal with this. So I he's been doing a lot of research, like in the last couple of months. Because I think he's at that point where like, man, we're spending like, 1000s of dollars a month on, like, on physical therapy, and just everything like he goes like two or three times a week. And even that, it's like, by the end of the week, sometimes you spent like four or $500 in one week on like body work for the both of us. As we're looking at, I can say that I think that's a like, we need to figure it out. You know, so I talk to you more about that later. You know,
Unknown Speaker 13:06
I, I you know, I'm not trying to sell anything, I just as someone who's been poked like a fucking pin cushion these last two years getting like, you know, us stem cells, Tijuana stem cells headed to Colombia, like, I hear about my fellow athletes who are in pain. And I'm like, I just want to like, get the message out there. So yeah, I will definitely speak to you offline about that. And it sounds like your husband can use it as well.
Unknown Speaker 13:32
Oh, yeah. He's like, 26 with, I don't know, like, they basically said like, I don't want to, like say it because like, not his injuries are not public. But his injuries like that. Are not that like doctors we trust, you know, not just medical doctors that are going to tell you what you you know what they're like, Yeah, you have a whatever of a 60 year old and like, yeah, you're 26
Unknown Speaker 13:52
Yeah, but you know what you're so young to like, okay, so I just want to start the podcast was saying when I was doing my research on you, like, obviously, I know who you are, and I've watched you fight, but you weren't doing this podcast, like I find out more because I'm actually doing research. And I just thought that you were older than me because you'd had so many fights. And you know, you're you're much younger than me. You're 32 I'm 35 And so my my first question to you right off the gate out of the gate is what are your plans as far as MMA go? Like? Are you just focused on jujitsu? Right now? Do you want to get back in the cage?
Unknown Speaker 14:33
I mean, I always when people asked me this question, I always say like, my I didn't imagine that my last fight was going to be my last fight. So I like you know, we opened the gym and we were not supposed to do that until we were ready to like for I guess personally for me, like with my husband, if there's both of us doing it, it's easier where he can still have his career and teach sometimes I teach also, but it's like I don't think we can both do it. But then when we had a gym with venom, and they shut it down I'm kind of like mid pandemic. We're like, man, we have all these students that we can, like, we can just like, abandon them, you know. So we basically got like, thrown into opening a gym. And I, you know, I just start like, having I don't want to say don't have any time, but it's been so hard like to open a business, build a business and still try to do jujitsu. I mean, I don't do Jiu Jitsu because it's easier for me to like, it is actually harder for me to do jujitsu. I feel like I'm more comfortable fighting MMA than I am doing jujitsu. But it's just been so hard to manage the schedule, like to go and train, you know how it is for me, you gotta just strike in one place wrestling, another place, striking, everything is in different place. And it's just been hard for me to do that while running a business. But right now we are getting more help. And now that my husband is also training just like straining to, you know, make his MMA debut. It's been easier, like, okay, like, now that he's going it's easier for me to be like, Okay, I can go as well. Yeah. I would love to fight again. You know, that's the short answer. I don't think that I'm like ready to say, Yeah, I'm done. I'm retired. I know that I haven't been active. But I'm still training every day, I'm in the best shape of my life, I still feel like my IQ for fighting in general is going up. So I went this week and went back to the to do some striking. So we'll see where that kind of leads this year. That gets
Unknown Speaker 16:17
me so excited. I would love to see you back in the cage. I really, you know, I follow you on social media. And it seems like, you know, you're a sixth time, you know, world champion on the ground seems like that's covered. You know, you're in great shape. It seems like that's covered, you know, and as long as you get your injuries in check, which there's, you know, other avenues. And we'll talk offline about that as well. Like, you're young, let's do it, girl, I got to see more Lionheart in the cage. Because, you know, you, yeah, you really have one of those fighting styles. That's just so exciting to watch.
Unknown Speaker 16:51
Thank you, I need to hear these things. Because I sometimes just feel like I've kind of fallen into that role of being like a coach and being a wife and being like running a business. And I still feel like I have that fire in me to like, not feel like I do. Like every day I'm what you know, even if it's like being true to or champion in the key or winning the grand slam in the ghee, like, these are all things that I want to do. But like, I do feel like that MMA side of me, I'm like, have gotten so far away from it, you know, and I went the other day to striking. And I was like I had I feel like from the last time to this time, it was even better. And so this morning, I was like telling my husband by before I went to the gym, I'm like, I think I want to I think I want to fight again. And he's like, Oh, no. Heart.
Unknown Speaker 17:37
Like, oh, yeah, I just had this. Yeah, I just had this conversation with my partner last night, because we were talking about some coaching situations. And he just looked at me and he's like, I'm so he's like, I want the best for you. Because it's hard for me. He's like, I'm being selfish. He's like, if I know you're getting the best coaching, he's like, then it takes some stress off of me, as your partner watching you step in there for war. Because like, at least I know, you're the most equipped, the most prepared that you can be. And I'm like, Yeah, but regardless, you know, it's always gonna suck, seeing the person you love walk into that cage. But, you know, it's like, for you and for me, you know, we have a lot of other things going on. But just like with Hinako, it's like, that window of fighting is so small, and it's closing all the time. And so I even told the listeners on the podcast the other day, it's like, I'm gonna have to pull back from this because there's plenty of time to podcast plenty of time for jujitsu plenty of time for all these other things, but like, our little window is closing. And I just don't want to have any regrets. And I know, I know. I know, you probably feel the same way.
Unknown Speaker 18:47
Yeah, you know, like, my career was not ideal. Like, I mean, you get it people have to remember like, I started fighting at a time when Dana White was like, there will never be women in the UFC and like, our only goal was like, Okay, I want to go to strike force at the time, like, Okay, now what strikes but then it was like, Oh, the weight divisions 145 And I was very small for that, you know, and then, you know, so then as things got grew, but it's like, okay, in my third or fourth fight, I'm fighting Amanda Nunez and then like the next one after I'm fighting Raquel Pennington and I'm like, just a baby you know the sport and everyone was growing but it's like when I fought Amanda I think she was already like six in a row with five or six knockouts and I'm you know, but that was the only and people are like, Oh, why did you take those fights and like those were the only fights I had to take. It's not I had a choice. There was no choice I fought so many good girls and I think I just lacked experience and I also like I should have I wish I could have taken my time you know, so right now as my husband is getting ready to start fighting me like luckily like he's, he's signed with one for grappling. So he probably will end up like going that route. I know that it will be hard for him like with his credentials to be like fighting in an amateur league. I don't even know it's like I got that for him. But with him, I'm like, Okay, well, like if you have to go, like, fighting pro right away, like, we need to make sure that, like, I'm not gonna have make the same mistakes with you that I did. You know, it's yeah, you know, then he's like, Oh man, there's this smoker at the gym. I'm like, no, he's like, what? It's just like a sparring. I'm like, then go to sparring? No. Oh, poker, because not the same. Like this, this makes sense in your head. Yeah. So experience already, like, I want to fight. I want to fight someone for real. And I'm like, Well, you will. But let's, let's make good choices. Let's not go to a smoker and some something happens, you know? Yep.
Unknown Speaker 20:38
Yep. That's so awesome. You know, because the dynamic in your relationship is that you're older than your husband. Right? Yeah. And so with that, you know, age comes wisdom and all the things that you went through in your fight career, you can now basically, you know, help him in his path and make sure he doesn't, like you said, do the same mistakes that you did. And one of those things. I did my research, like I said, and I wanted to bring it up, but you basically brought it up right now, it's like, in this article, you said, one of your greatest regrets was not having managed your MMA career better. They know, is that kind of what you mean by just taking too many fights too soon?
Unknown Speaker 21:15
Yes. Like, I think like, as you said, I was the tough like, I could take, you know, I came forward, I could take a punch, I could give a punch. And people like seeing that. But I know, I know, especially like, in the promotion that I was in, like, I was kind of like the stepping stone for people. And I also like, never have I have never made like excuses, either. But I'm like, there are some fights that I'm like, you don't really lose that fight. You know, like, now when I look back at it now, like, I watched the fight over and over again. And I'm like, I don't know that I lost that fight. You know, but I will never at this time I've ever publicly said that. I will never, like make an excuse. I've always been like, Oh, I lost, I lost but I'm like, I know, I know what they were doing with me. It's like, oh, she's a tough fight. She's gonna bring a good show. But let's put her to fight. You know what I'm talking about later, when I'm growing. And I did feel like I was much better and I'm like, Okay, well, I see kind of where I was, you know, like, and I wish I still, you know, even like my husband, he made that comment and he's never ever like said anything like that. He's always super encouraging. But I think like, he is nervous about it, but he's always tells me like are killed like you haven't even like been able been able to perform at your potential in jujitsu, or in or in MMA is like, like the person that you are in the gym. You know, it's like, if we like it little by little, like you're being able to translate it, like in competition, like, especially for jujitsu, or even like, the last time that I taught everybody, I still think I had a great performance. But, you know, that was like me not having fought for three years. Yeah. Oh, I think I think like my, the fighter that I am, I haven't even been able to show, like how skilled I am. If that makes sense. Of course, I would love to do that. Like I would love to be able to perform once or, you know, I don't know, just to be able to perform to like the best of my ability. Like, I haven't even been through that yet.
Unknown Speaker 23:02
Yeah, I understand. You know, this is my podcast. So all the listeners know about my situation. But, you know, I'm open about my sobriety, you know, I was fucking, I wasn't taking things seriously, I would train hard, but you're not at your true best. If you're not recovering, you're not doing everything right. And so now it's like, you know, we may have these dings, and we may be a little older, but I really feel that we are in our prime, you know, like, some of these younger girls. They are durable, they're tough, but they don't want know what the fuck they're getting into. They don't know what it's like to be in the third round on the you know, having to pull come back. And you know, like, it's just, we have that inside of us. You know, and we were battle tested now. And yes, and it's just about lining up all the other shit that we have in our lives. And, you know, only you know, when that the right time is, but I just found out you were 32. And I'm like, Oh, she's got to get back in there. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 24:01
Because I feel like I'm like, like, all mad 32. Like, every time like, every year, I'm like, Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, but like, I guess like 32 is still I mean, I feel amazing. You know, that's the truth. Like I yeah, I am in like, I am the best athlete I've ever been. But when you know you think about 32 of those people getting CFCs 70.
Unknown Speaker 24:20
But we like I said, it's like we possess some qualities that those girls just won't get in it for years, years and years and years. So I'm excited and I actually didn't know that your origin story is that your father was a big name fighter and Hawaii. Could you give us kind of like the brief synopsis of that because it's so
Unknown Speaker 24:39
yeah, yeah, so my dad, like locally like he's well known locally, but he was like the like the first like I people will see that he's a first MMA fighter from Hawaii because it's kind of true, like the first event that they ever held in Hawaii. I'm pretty sure that there were two it was called Future bras. It was before when you're probably familiar with super bra. So Like this it was like a big show back in the day where even like Anders, I mean, like Anderson Silva like Robbie Lawler and then it became like elite Axi, I believe and anyways, but they my dad fought on the very first event ever held in Hawaii was in a strip club.
Unknown Speaker 25:21
He loud, there's a little background noise but I can hear you
Unknown Speaker 25:24
can hear me okay. And it was like in a strip club and they had like a, like a eight man bracket so he fought three times in the night. Wow. And there was no rules, no gloves, nothing. I think the only rule is that you couldn't poke the eyes and you couldn't fish hook.
Unknown Speaker 25:40
Probably no weight classes either, huh? No, no. So,
Unknown Speaker 25:44
guys, I think he did like one armbar. And he won like the first ever event held a boy, I want to say he will there were two of those future bras that he won the second one as well. And then it became like super broad and started becoming like a big, like a big event in Hawaii. What's your father's name? His name? Well, his name is David palsy. He but then he also went by kavika. Okay, so he I think my I want to say that he's like, 11 and one. Wow, he's got an impressive record as well.
Unknown Speaker 26:10
Okay. And impressive for fighting guys out of your weight class.
Unknown Speaker 26:14
Yes. Yeah. Like, they, you know, so like, he's why he kind of talked to my parents, like divorced, and he was like, taking care of us for a while, like, the four of us were living with him. And he kind of just, you know, was, you know, it just became like, second on the list of things to do, you know, so I wish that might like, we got to see more of him. Because he He's amazing. Like, if your app, you know, when when this is done, go? Good. You can go. He's got some videos on YouTube, he's pretty mean, then you'll understand where I get it from.
Unknown Speaker 26:45
I love that. Yeah. And so I know, that probably was the reason you got started. You know, but, you know, I want to talk a little bit about the sex and violence aspect of the podcast. And I love finding out kind of the relationship dynamic with parents, you know, especially, you know, you're Hawaiian, I'm not familiar with a lot of the Hawaiian culture. And so I'm wondering, you know, did your mom and your dad have the talk with you about love and romance and sex? Or was it not spoke about kinda?
Unknown Speaker 27:18
I mean, not I don't think my parents ever had like a specific especially because at around that time is when they were going through the divorce. But like, my mom, and my dad was always very open about I feel like they're always very open about sex and stuff in general, like, especially more so my mom, I think, as we were like, after my parents split, and we were living more, we were living with my mom. She was She always kind of talked to us about those things, but not so much. My dad, I think only now is in when I turned 18. It was kind of funny, because I went and wrestled for a year in high school. And then I came back, and I was supposed to go back and wrestle and some things happen. So I ended up that's why I started fighting MMA because my dad was like, Well, if you're not going back to school, if you're not going back to wrestle, like, you need to figure out what you're going to do. So I started working construction with him, because that was like the only job. Like, I was like, Okay, I need a job, we need to make money. So he got me a job working construction with him. And he's like, Well, you need to figure out like, what you're gonna do, and I was like, Well, I kind of been thinking about fighting MMA. He's like, Well, if you want to fight me, like, you need to make a decision right now. Like, that's how Hawaiian parents usually are. Like, my dad was very, I guess, like a very, like old school. Like, I you know, I he still looks at me, and I'm like, this when I was an adult, you know, but, um, so then he basically like made me kind of make like a 10 year plan. And I literally, like, I think I told him I wanted to fight in August, and I had my first fight in November. Yeah, so it was like, he was like, well, you're eating make a plan, you need to stick to it. What are you going to do? You need to figure it out? Like, you're not going back to college? That's done. So what are you gonna do?
Unknown Speaker 28:45
Wow, I love that like nuts. You know, having a parent, like, tell you that you need to make plans. Because, you know, goals and dreams don't just fucking happen. You have to map them out and plan them out. And so Wow, what a badass move by your dad.
Unknown Speaker 29:00
So but during that time when I was like working with him, and I you know, now I'm like, 18, turning 19 He was way more open with me about those things like as an adult, but like when I was a kid, no, my mom, I feel like through my teenage years and stuff she was but not not so much when I was not my dad. Not so much when I was a teen.
Unknown Speaker 29:18
Yeah. So, I mean, I know you're married to her notto. Now seven years.
Unknown Speaker 29:23
We're making seven years this year? Yes.
Unknown Speaker 29:25
Okay. I want to know, pre Hinako how has dating changed? Because we're in our 30s now and I love asking this question. How was dating? How was dating different for you in your 20s versus your 30s?
Unknown Speaker 29:41
Well, so I met I mean, I met Hinata when I was 25. Okay, so I was quite young already. When you say dating, like how was it like meeting people and stuff?
Unknown Speaker 29:51
Yeah, I mean, so I just know that the way that I conducted myself, you know, in my early teens was very different than my early 20s. And it's very different now in my third Yes, yeah.
Unknown Speaker 30:03
But I so I know for sure I and I think offline you and I kind of talked about this over the phone was that like, the it's like dating now is so hard, right? Like, I'm so glad that I'm not single because I'm like, I would not be able to like live in the world as it is now. But I remember like beforehand Otto like it. It was just in that age where it was still kind of weird to like, meet someone online. Yeah. But it was like, it's so hard. Like, especially being in Hawaii. It's like the, the area is so small, you know? So it's kind of like, we're like, oh, how do you meet people like, oh, through Instagram or through you notice, like, you see these people all the time, but you don't know how to talk. And it was like, I felt like when I think about that it was like he was so immature. Like I can't believe like, that's how we had to meet people or like that he didn't need people to talk to people. Yeah, it was like, through Instagram or through Facebook or whatever it was, you know, but um, yeah, dating, dating.
Unknown Speaker 30:55
But now it's so much more common because you're right, you know, when you were 25. You know, I was, you know, probably 27 Somewhere around there, whatever math. But you know, it's like, at that point, it was like online dating. And now it's so normal. You know, when you're speaking right now, I forgot I had another Hawaiian fighter on Sumiko Inaba. Do you familiar with her? Yeah, she was like, yeah, when you're on an island, she's like, as you get older, the pool, the dating pool just shrinks? And I was like, yeah, she was like, just run into some issues of like, Who the hell am I gonna date.
Unknown Speaker 31:33
Another thing too, is like people and like, I can't remember recently, someone was talking to me about this. And they're like, men, Hawaiians, like they find a person when they're young. And they just stay with them. And I And it's true. Like a lot of my friends are married to their high school sweetheart. Like now we're 32. And they've been with him like my brother, for instance. He's been with his wife since he was 15. He's 33 now. So like, they've been together longer than they've been apart?
Unknown Speaker 31:56
What do you think that's from? Like, is there something in Hawaiian culture? I mean, you guys are like penguins. Do you guys make fun?
Unknown Speaker 32:02
Yeah, I think so. That thing of like, like, it's so small, you know? So it's like, okay, you know, so I feel like you kind of just find your person and you kind of just stay with them. And I also feel like wine families are very close. So like, as soon as they got together, and they were 15. It was like, their family became my family. So like, your family has just become super close. And like her sisters felt like my sisters. And like me, now that I live away. It's a little harder. But it's like, you know, this last trip, I went home in November, I saw my, my brother's wife, his sister. And it's like, I went to the I went to her restaurant, and she took care of us. And it's just like, like, I've seen her every day since, you know, over the last 10 years, but I've really over the last 10 years, I've barely very seen her, you know, so I think that's kind of the aspect there like with that is just like you've kind of just like, uh, well, there's 10 people. That's my person. We just stay together forever.
Unknown Speaker 32:52
Oh, yeah, for sure. I mean, regardless, you guys are been married for seven years. You're making it work. You're happy. You're opening businesses together competing together. So yeah, you found your penguin, your happiness. I love it.
Unknown Speaker 33:06
And I didn't think that because I had like one serious boyfriend before him and that I kind of dated someone on and off for like a year. But I think that I always had this idea of like, wanting to do something more. So I didn't ever want to settle down in Hawaii. Like I didn't want to stay there with someone and like, not be able to just leave if I wanted to leave. But then there was also that aspects like, oh, what's wrong with me? Like, why is everyone with someone? And I'm not. You know, you
Unknown Speaker 33:29
felt that pressure early on? Oh, yeah, for sure. Like,
Unknown Speaker 33:32
I mean, even in intermediate like, I think that there, I think I'm also a bigger girl. So a lot of like, what they liked was like, you know, the petite small girls. And I was like,
Unknown Speaker 33:43
you know, like, in my life,
Unknown Speaker 33:45
like towering towering over everyone, like, taller, too. So I think that I just wasn't like, wanted as much. And as I got as I started, you know, I was like, man, all my friends, even high school. My friends were like, with their boyfriends for like, three, four years, like throughout the entire school, and some of them are married now. And I'm like, man, you know what's going on? But I mean, you know, thank God.
Unknown Speaker 34:06
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you were in Hawaii when you met Hinako?
Unknown Speaker 34:11
No, I was in Vegas. Okay, I moved here in 2014. And then I actually met him in 2015 because he would come here twice a year to train and then we started dating in 2016. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 34:22
I read I feel like a stalker but I read this awesome story about you how you were like, basically like just moved from Hawaii with like a fucking bag and like, just ready to be an MMA fighter and didn't know anybody. I was like, this girl's got the fire like that kind of like motivation and like risk taking just to fulfill your dreams is like that's championship mentality. I love that.
Unknown Speaker 34:46
Thank you. And I mean not to say that that was like easy and I feel like that was very out of like the ordinary for me because I am very like it's hard for me to deal with not deal with change is hard for me to like make changes like nowadays is much easier was still like, I mean, change is hard for everyone is like I was literally like at home with nothing. So I was like, I don't even know how I'm gonna make this work. But I'm like, I can have nothing here. I can have nothing there.
Unknown Speaker 35:12
Yeah, at least I'm chasing a dream somewhere. Right, exactly. I love that. So do you guys have like a cute meat story? Or was it just in the gym on the mat?
Unknown Speaker 35:21
Well, I mean, the how we kind of started dating is like a, like a very long story shorter. He was 19 at the time. And it's kind of ironic because he came here looking for something more. So he's a student of his father's he's been trading since he was like eight years old. And he at the time, he was 19. He was going to turn 20 soon. But he was kind of like hitting that wall. Like where he was always like, at the major tournaments, like the world championships at Pan Am's is always like second place. Third place, second place, third place like or, you know, he you know, there's like five matches, and it's only the quarterfinals still. And he like gets out of the quarterfinals. And he's cut he kind of was like Matt, I need something different. And he was kind of known at the time as like a purple and a brown belt because he felt like a lot of good guys on the circuit. So then they ended up that year. That was in March 2016. He was coming for the Pan Am's and he was planning to stay but he was planning to leave our team. So he wasn't gonna stay in our association. And like a long story short, my coach at the time kind of saw that something was going on because they saw like some other well known coaches talking to him at the time, okay. He asked him and here they are what's going on? Like, so he told me they you know, we're planning like, I was planning to the the team. And they're like, he basically asked him to stay. And he's like, Hey, give me a chance. Like, come to Las Vegas, you can stay with me up until the worlds I can, you know, Coach you I can help you. So that was kind of how he ended up here. Okay. I knew that. He and there was two boys, him and another. I mean, there was him and someone else. And I knew that from the previous year. So I was like, oh, you know, they're here. I think that they're seeing it Roberts and he had just bought a new house. So I knew there was nothing in the house, because they were literally just moving everything there. So I was kinda like, oh, man, like, I don't even know if they've got Wi Fi set up. Like, I don't know if there's even furniture in there. So after one of the trainings is kind of getting Do you guys want to go hang out whenever the other guys was offered more? So like, oh, let's go eat and like go to the jacuzzi or something. Yeah. So a bunch of us did that. I think might have been like on a Wednesday or something. And honestly, like I was not. That was he'll joke and say like, I was trying to, like find a way in, but I was actually kind of like in and out, like dating someone at the time. But I was like on the hour. I was like, like, it was like one year and it was it was not that it was an unhealthy relationship. But it was like he had so much baggage. And it was like, oh, sometimes we stopped. We've kind of like, okay, we need to take a break, like needing to figure shit out. And then we start dating again, and I gotta need to take a break, like figure shit out. So it's kind of in that place where I'm like, I think I'm over this. Yeah, you know, so when he saw when we went to hang out, it was really just me being like, oh, man, these poor boys like they're here. And I think that I don't even know if the heat is on and the where they're staying, you know. So then we all just went to like, eat and hang out. And of course, like we're in the jacuzzi, and one of my other girlfriends came and she's kind of like, at the time, like more brave about talking about things. And she's like talking about our sex life. So you're like, the whole sex topic started coming up, you know, I'm kind of like quiet and just listening. And then he says something, and I kind of was like, at the time again, I'm like, kind of sick of where I was at with my like relationship at the time. And at the time, I was already thinking of like, man, like, I've given this guy, like a year of my life, and it's not going anywhere. And I was like, I kind of want to have some fun, you know, so then he started like, seeing all these things. And I'm like, man, here's this, like, 19 year old kid that's gonna be here for three months. And I'm like, you know, like, like, I've been thinking, like, like, what is the word? Like, I've been faithful to this guy for one year? Yeah. You know, so then we kind of were just like, making little, you know, like flirting a little back and forth. And I was like, Okay, so like a funny story as we went up. Oh, he at the time, he can speak very good English. Like if you speak to him, like he has very, very good English like he's walking in here. This story. He hates he loves telling this story, because it's different than my version. But he he's he at the time. He doesn't didn't speak like great English. Okay. Pretty good. Like he had taken four years of English. So we're sitting, we're sitting in, he's like, Oh, I had to go teach class. I'm like, hey, I need to go teach class. Can I take a shower? I asked my friend, can I go take a shower? And he's like, Oh, do you want to take any economy shower? Like economy shower, but like for him in English, that made sense. Like, you know, like, let's just save water. And I was like, Okay. Like, that's it. Yeah, sure. For me that was very brave to say like, very shy, like, I wouldn't even like you know, like, want people seeing me A kid are Yeah, but I was just because I knew he wouldn't do it, you know, so we go, go and take a shower. I didn't know that outside. He was trying to come into the shower. Are you doing you're crazy? Because like what she said I could take a shower and end up coming in because then he got scared. And his friend has a you know, she's actually dating someone like she's dating so and so. And he's like, Oh, shit, okay, I didn't know, you know. So anyways, I come out and our other friend goes take a shower. We're like sitting on the we're sitting on the couch, and we're just kind of like talking and stuff. He claims that I started rubbing his leg with my foot. Like, I don't remember the stories. She said her rubbing her rubbing my leg with her phone like that ever happened. ever happened? Do you know? Is like I think like there was so much like tension being built up because it was like over the last hour or two hours or like, you know, seeing all these little things. And then finally, I think his friend kind of got the hint. So he was like, Oh, I'm gonna go outside real quick. And, you know, grab my clothes. It was very immature. Like when I think about it now like, you know, but um, yeah, I basically just like, attacked him on the couch. And I love it on and after that we've been literally been inseparable since.
Unknown Speaker 41:13
Wow. Yeah. How long? Were you guys dating before you got married?
Unknown Speaker 41:19
Three months. Whoa. A little over three months? Because basically like so after that. First. I think it was Wednesday. We basically did the same thing the next day because my my friend that we were at the jacuzzi. It was like Wednesday and Thursday he was off. So we did the same thing on Thursday. And then on Friday night, we hung out. And then basically by Saturday, I he was like living with me like he never left. So we I mean, I think the mistake we made is we were like staying up until four o'clock. And like, again, he was like coming here for something better. And I was here for something better, too. So, I mean, I was 25. He was 19. We were very young. And we just had all these dreams and ambitions. And we were just up till four o'clock in the morning talking about all this stuff. And I was like, Man, that was our mistake is like we started talking, you know. So then, when it was time for him to go back to Brazil, at the time, they were a little bit more stricter. And he like you were required required to have like a plane ticket that was going back. Okay. And basically, I mean, he could stay for six months. That was his visa, like he could stay for for up to six months. But we were kind of nervous because we're like, man, like, what if you go back and they don't let you come back? Because you overstayed like on I think it's like a 994 or something like you you said you were coming back on this day, then you didn't come back and you stayed longer than you were supposed to. And I was always like, Oh, what if you go back and you don't have money to come back? Like well, maybe I don't do until next March. You know, that's nine months from now. Okay, so then, you know, before the worlds out, we were talking about, like getting married, so I want to just get married so that you can stay here. And yeah, and it kind of sounds crazy. Again, like, like when I talked about me packing up my bags and moving, or me like doing that just coming and being like, oh, yeah, let's get married. Like, at the time, it was very unlikely, like, very, very unlikely. But I knew that, like, I knew that he was the one for me, like it was when you know, you know, you know, so I ended up just, I was like, Well, I'm going to talk like we didn't tell his dad, you know, his dad's his coach. His dad was thinking like, Oh, my son's gonna go to the Pan Am's and come back with me for three months, and then he's just never going to come back. The only one that does relate to his dad, like that's his dad's full time job. He has a gym in Brazil, and it's actually does very well. And yeah, so then when he went to the worlds after he actually won that year, that was the first year he won. So for him, he was like, like, this is it. Like, you're the difference. You're the person that, like you're the difference in my life. Like, I'm like we're gonna get that's it? You know, so I was like, oh, we need to tell your dad that you're not coming home. You know, so then I was like, I learned how to say ask to marry his son in Portuguese, like, Oh,
Unknown Speaker 43:54
my God, that's adorable.
Unknown Speaker 43:57
Basically asked him like, hey, you know, like, we're getting married, and he's gonna stay here. And his dad was like, you know, like, of course, like we've been together for three months. Like that's like when I think about it now. I'm like, Why didn't anyone tell us that we were crazy. But I think like if you saw us together, you knew that. It just made sense. Because then I ended up taking him home after like, the next week. I took him home to white and my family just loved him like absolutely lovely. Yeah, so then I was uh, I kind of told some of them like, Hey, we're gonna get married. I didn't tell my dad I was too scared it's kind of becoming a long story. But yeah, so then I came back and a couple of weeks later we got married.
Unknown Speaker 44:34
I love that holy crap. I love that so much and you know that just you hear people Oh, we got married for the visa or whatever it is right and you never hear that it works out long term. You just don't. And but you guys have and so it's easy. That's great. I love that so much. I you know you don't you also don't hear about the age difference. You know, you do sometimes with an older guy. but not it's usually not the female that's older. How's the age difference ever? You know, what, what are the benefits? And what are some of the downsides of that age gap? Because it's six years, right?
Unknown Speaker 45:11
Six years. Yeah. So, I mean, in the beginning, it was hard because not only was there an age difference, but there was also like a cultural difference. Which barrier there was, you know, like, I'm a, I'm a woman, he's a man, like, that's different, in general. So I feel like that first year of being together was hard. I don't want to say it was hard. Like, there was never like a point in our marriage, like, not even once, where you're like, Oh, this is not what we want. Like, we got married to be in this forever. And we have a very, I will like being honest, like, we have a very healthy and very happy relationship. But it's not with it without work is like, talking a lot, figuring it out, like figuring out what works with each other, like we do, like communicate a lot. But the age difference, I feel like it, it was never really a factor for us, because he was very mature, because he got to imagine like, he was basically thrown into, like the role of being like a leader and a head coach at the age of 22. So it's like, he's got like, we're responsible for, like, 150 160 people. And you know, even I always think it's funny because he's 22 is like we have students are like Lieutenant Colonel's, that are doctors that are lawyers that are like, these people that are like, so experienced in life, and they're all like, looking to him for guidance. Yeah. On the management and other things, too, you know, so he is very mature, like not to say that he's not immature. Because like, I feel like all men like their children forever. Yeah. But he's, he's very mature. So I don't feel like I ever felt that age difference. But there is like, you know, like little things like I am much to I do get much more tired faster, I'm gonna go I just want to hang out at home where he's still like, he needs to do something fun every single day, like, oh, he'll be training all day long. And he really is one of those people that like he is the last person on the mat. He's does the most like, when I think that I'm training, Trey. I've trained like, harder than anyone else. Like he's probably trained way harder than I have. But he's like, Oh, it's like, 830 we find the closer I'm sick. I'm gonna go to skate park. I'm gonna go skate. You know, like, he has to do something fun every day. It's hard for me because I'm like, Oh, my spare time. I want to take a nap. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 47:15
yeah. Oh, yeah. That's that 20 year old mentality. A 2020 year old energy.
Unknown Speaker 47:20
Yeah, yeah. So yeah, just that, like, he does have a lot more energy than I do. So I mean, even you know, you know, your thing. It's called Sex and violence. So even that, like keeping up with him as a 1920 21. And fixes that 19 You know, so I'm like, Come get it. Oh, man. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 47:39
I mean, no, you're not. You're not getting old at all. You know, it's, I feel like we always feel like we're getting old because we gauge our age on like, fighting scale, right? Like, we're older and fighting, but like in life, we're so fucking young. It's crazy. My party. Yeah. My partner's mom the other day looked at him. He's, you know, he's younger than I am, as well. And he just turned 33. And his mom was like, You're such a baby. You're just you just started your life. You just started your life. And you know, when you hear that from like an older person, it puts it in perspective, you're like, oh, yeah, we have so much life to live and for you, so many more fights, so many more fights.
Unknown Speaker 48:18
Also, I'm like, when I think about my parents, like, my parents were like, my age with four kids, you know, so when I put it into perspective, like that, I'm like, Man, I used to think of my parents when I was, you know, younger. And I'm like, man, they're, they're so old. And they're so and when really they were not like they were also children raising children. Yeah, I think that also go mad. 30 something like, Man, I'm so old. And I'm but it's true. Like, it's 100% True. Like, we are very young still,
Unknown Speaker 48:45
of course. And so as far as like, age, and all that goes, I gotta ask because you mentioned like, cultural difference, you know, you're Hawaiian. He's Brazilian. And I'm also wondering, you know, you guys are married, but you're to elite level athletes, and you're a female. So like, if children come, does the talk of children ever come into play? Yeah, we're, I'm
Unknown Speaker 49:08
getting what I'm kind of getting ready for. So we were supposed to be trying, like, I kind of feel like okay, at the end of last year, that was when I kind of wanted to start trying for kids. Then I asked him I was like, I would like to have one more season like, this year and maybe like the first half of next year, you know, depending how the results are again, I've got this injury that I'm like, oh, you know, like I like it is like the last couple of weeks that I've been dealing with all of this. I'm like, Man, I can see a way out now. Like I do see an after which I'm also preparing for two but he's been ready to be a dad for forever. Like, you know how there's just women that know they want to be a mom. I've been that I don't not want children but like, I've never wanted children but I've never not wanted children. So I just had like no real feeling about it. But he's knows that like he knows he wants children. Like he is like dying to be a dad. So I mean, he's he's patient. And then he knows like, I have some things I want to do first, but I think within like the next to like a year and a half or so two years I should probably be, probably have a little belly on me soon.
Unknown Speaker 50:11
Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah, so big decisions coming up, right? I mean, first and foremost, you know, you know, gotta get as healthy as you can just for life and longevity, right? And then I mean, if you do decide to get back in the cage, you know, that would be amazing. But you also, you know, you're 32 it's just,
Unknown Speaker 50:30
and that's the thing. It's like it all like, I've waited this long. So if I do maybe this year, my goal I want to fight, you know, and I can either fight or two or three, or whatever it is, then obviously, like, we'll wait, like, I think, you know, the latest, I want to start having kids maybe like 35. Yeah, just, you know, I just did like all my blood work and all this stuff, and everything's pretty good. So I think I'm like, in a pretty good position to wait a little bit longer, but just, you know, being able to still enjoy it and not feel like, you know, like, I don't know, I waited this long, so I could wait another year, you know.
Unknown Speaker 51:04
So for you and Hanako have already done some crazy things together. But I love asking the question, because fighters were just crazy in general. What's either the craziest thing you've done for love? Or maybe the most romantic? I don't know if you're like a romantic or not?
Unknown Speaker 51:20
Oh, praise someone after three months?
Unknown Speaker 51:25
That is romantic and crazy at the same time?
Unknown Speaker 51:28
Yeah, I mean, I would say that's probably the craziest thing I've ever done for love. Because three months we might we got married after three months. Like, I don't know that there's anything that tops that
Unknown Speaker 51:39
now, is there anything that you would have changed?
Unknown Speaker 51:43
No, not at all. Nothing? No, not at all. I honestly like I it sounds like, like, you know, when we when people say these, like, pretty sure though, like, we have, like a very great relationship. And I love like, I love our story.
Unknown Speaker 51:58
I I love I love it so much, because it's so similar. Not not the age and you know, and getting married and all that. But, you know, my partner is also a black belt, you know, I'm competing, you know, he, you know, does jujitsu, you know, as well. So I want to know, like, what kind of issues good or bad actually have come up like, you know, because you said it's hard for two people to be the star of the show, right? It's a very selfish sport, you know that anyone who's ever fought, they understand that you don't want to be selfish, but you have to be selfish. Right? So how do you navigate that with Hinako? Like you said, Who's vowed to make his pro debut, but you know, you may want to?
Unknown Speaker 52:41
Yeah, you know, and it's hard because, like, I am naturally a nurturer. Like even with my friends, I'm a pusher I like want to take care of everyone. And I'm very much so that way with notto. And I realized, like, a couple of years ago, like I was putting so much stress on myself to like, take care of everything. When no one ever asked that of me. I was like, what, like, why am I putting all this pressure on me to like, make sure that he's got three meals on the table every day and a coffee in the morning in the evening, and his clothes are washed. And, you know, so like, I mean, and that's also just a personal thing that I had to work through where like, everything doesn't have to be perfect. Like, I can, like right now behind me, it's like there's a pile of clothes. And, you know, there's geese that's been folded all week that I haven't taken to the gym. And like, I really had to, like, let go and realize, like, if I want to be able to still be an athlete and be like, training, I want to train and being rested. I again, like resting, I want to rest recover, I want to recover. Like I do need to make more time for myself, you know. And the funny thing is like, I did start putting myself first and I have this conversation with a lot of like my friends whom like nothing really changed. I still do a lot of the same things, except for like little things like I stopped making his breakfast because that morning time is for me now. Like I go and I think sometimes I still will make his coffee or make his his food was like he never was like, Oh, you don't make me breakfast anyway. Yeah, like was such like a smooth transition where he he didn't even miss it. He just is like, Okay, well, she does her own thing in the morning. Now I gotta I'm responsible for breakfast, you know, or me just being vocal, like, Hey, can you make sure like when you bring your clothes in, like, put it in the wash, you know, like, if you're gonna, you know, and he does everything without complaining. So it's just that like, really like teamwork when I know like people say like, teamwork makes the dream work. But I'm like, we really are a team that has to work together. And I know like last year, like one thing I didn't really like was that I know that he I did ATCC trials and it was like the 60 and under. So it was very hard for me to make that weight. So basically for like three months I was in such an intense week, like weight cutting and like training to me basically like to make the weight. You know, it wasn't even about like being prepared for the tournament. Like I was prepared for the tournament three weeks before but I think by the end I was like under 10% body fat. It was like, you know, it's it was a 24 hour a day job just to make the weight. Yeah, basically like didn't do anything for the first stuff of the year so that I could I think that was the first time that he kind of stopped everything for me. And then after that, first, that first half of the year, I kind of stopped everything for him because he made his one debut. And then he had ADCC, which were like two really big things. And I kind of stopped for him to support him and teach him to make sure like, if he needed to be in California training, he could leave, and I would run the business. So then at the end of the year, we had this conversation I had this Congressman was like, Look, I have one more season left. And I'm like, you have the contract with one you want to make your MMA debut. And I was like, I don't want it to be like this, where we feel like we need to stop to support the other person. I'm like, we don't have to like we never did that before, you know, but there was always like, one person having to support more this time, and the other person having support that time. And I was like, this year, I want to do all the major tournaments. So like next year, next week, I was supposed to be in Paris competing in the Europeans. But then again, I got injured, so I'm out of that. But like I bought the ticket, I'm like any capacity. If you want me to go with you, I'm gonna go I'm like, No, I don't. Because what happens is you come with me for a week or week and a half. And then you have to come back. And then it's like a week of being like, yeah, jet lagged out of your schedule. I was like, so then you basically have to restart all over again. And like you did, like two and a half weeks not really doing anything. And so you know, he had this conversation, like, look, I'm gonna go, if you can come, if it fits into your schedule, you come, same thing for me. Like, if it fits into your schedule that I go to Europe, or go to, like to Singapore with you or to wherever you're competing at in Asia, I'll go, and we kind of was like, okay, like that works, you know, because it doesn't mean that I don't care about him, or he doesn't care about me or that his goals are more important than mine. It's just like, we have to be able to do that to be successful. Now we have people who can help us to run the gym. So it's like, you don't really have to worry about that if you have to leave. But we do need to make sure that we're like, like, again, he's 26. I'm 32. I've got like, a few more years left, you know, at most. Yeah. So I like I don't want to stop anymore. I don't want to wait. Not that he ever asked me. He never asked me I did that to myself. But it's like, okay, like, the last six months of the year, I kind of spent taking care of the gym and making sure that he's doing what he needs to do. But I'm not making sure I'm doing what I need to do. That makes
Unknown Speaker 57:07
total sense to me. Because just like you said, it's a personality type like that, that's you, you probably you enjoy doing that you enjoy. Yeah, and so what you had to do was make yourself a priority, so that you knew that you were getting what you needed. And it's not like you don't make him a priority. But that just makes total sense. Because I'm I'm very much the same way with my partner. And you know, I've said it on the podcast, it's like, there's two ways of thinking, it's better to be single, and in the prime of your competition, you're competing, you know, or it's better to have a partner, someone who loves and supports you. And it can go either way, but it's how you deal with it, right? Because you can have a partner and give too much of yourself to that person. So it's not like they're taking away you're taking yourself away from you know, your quality of time that you need and whatnot. So that makes sense to me. 100%. And that's actually hard when you love someone so fucking much, and want to make sure they have their coffee that they have food in their belly, you know, that they didn't forget this that they you know, but then at the same time, you're like, Okay, there's only so many hours in a day, and you have to make sure you give the time to yourself as well. Right?
Unknown Speaker 58:18
Yeah, so I feel like we've we've, we've been like waiting in the middle, like on a lot of things where I was, like, very extreme. And, and again, like literally just asking him like, I, I feel like men, a lot of times you have to kind of guide them like, Hey, can you do this? Can you do that? Like, before he was like, he might not think of doing it on his own. Like, he'll never complain. And it's, you know, sometimes we'll check in and be like, hey, what do you want me to do? Like, what do you need from you? You know, and I think we're good too. And again, this is like seven years of being together. Of course, you know, so sometimes,
Unknown Speaker 58:49
I feel like it may be hard for our person, not like fighters to ask for help, right? Oh, yes, that's me. So it's like learning to be like, can you please do this? I couldn't do it. But it would help me out if you could do it to
Unknown Speaker 59:04
know for sure. Yeah, I It's that is something that I'm working on is like asking for help. But with everything because, yeah, you know, you have this giant list of things you need to get done and you can't like you know, I can
Unknown Speaker 59:15
do it all. Yeah. I bet you carry all the groceries in one Hall.
Unknown Speaker 59:20
Yeah, he doesn't like that. Either. You know, yes or no, I got it. You can do things looking at me.
Unknown Speaker 59:30
That's a fighter girl thing for sure.
Unknown Speaker 59:32
Like they he is like, you know, when you asked like, what is the, like, the craziest thing you did for love? Or like he's very much romantic. Oh, yeah. And he and he really likes being like, oh, like he wants to carry everything or he wants to do everything or you know he's very much like that. And I'm also like, I want to carry everything to you know, like this workout, everything that workout,
Unknown Speaker 59:53
what are what are some of the physical characteristics and then also personality traits that like really attracted you to Hinata?
Unknown Speaker 1:00:03
Oh, physically I feel like when I watched because he I mean, if you've ever watched him do jujitsu, like he has such a dynamic style. And I feel like that was the thing that I was like, Oh my gosh, like it was different though. So even just like
Unknown Speaker 1:00:15
a fighter girl response, I'm like, What? What did you think was hard? You're like, Oh, he's so good at jujitsu?
Unknown Speaker 1:00:23
Is that like, when you say physical? I feel like yeah, he's like watching him. Like, even just train. It's like an experience like he, you know, like they did this whole documentary about him on photographing a couple of years ago. And I talked about how like, he was the guy that really started like putting, like, all that crazy stuff. He was like, the first guy to do like a backflip and a match. And he knows like, he's very dynamic. And I really liked that about him. But I have to choose like a thing about him. Like, I really liked that he's like, which is funny, right? As a fighter, but he has such a, like a lean body type, or he's like, tall. He's that. I mean, he's extremely tall. But he's like, long, you know? So I like how long his arms are. And like, I don't know how to explain it. But uh, he's long. Yes. Like, whatever. Its arms and stuff. I'm like, oh, you know, that's just. And he. He also has very long eyelashes and like big eyes like that. Yeah. And then personality wise, I love that. He's very, I don't know, like, I don't know, he's very funny. He's actually very funny. He He's always making like jokes. And he's, but like, one thing that I've always been attracted to is that he's, he's, I don't know what the word is. Like, I always say like, situationally intelligent. Like, he knows how to be with anyone, like you can put him with a, like, he's very mature. But he's very like, like, if he's talking to a doctor, if he's talking in front of a room of people, like he can really like capture, capture, like an audience, but he can also Like, like, he knows how to be with different people. Not that it's a different personality or a different, but it's just like, if he's talking to someone who's very educated, like he can hold a conversation with him, and he's very intelligent himself. Or if he's just with the boys, he's very funny and relaxed and laid back. But I love that he's like, situationally intelligent, because it can be like, I mean, everyone's got that friend that you're afraid to, like, take around people. You know, oh, yeah, we do. You know, like, I've never felt like, when he was 19, I was never like, embarrassed to take him home. Because I knew that he would be like, he would be fine. Like he, he
Unknown Speaker 1:02:19
knows how to adapt and read the room. And, you know, he understands like, what crowd he's hanging out with.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:27
One thing that I've always like, been super, like, attracted to about him, which is probably like this in the other room like, thing to say.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:38
So you guys are still actively competing. You know, he's in his 20s. So he's got the drive. You know what I mean? Do you guys have any rituals or kind of rules? Do you guys abstain from sex before competition? It's always kind of like a big one that I like asking.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:55
Yeah, I feel like that he went through a phase where he was like, oh, we can't do that. You know, like, I did it. Not that I didn't believe in it. But I think I've been doing it for so long. Like it doesn't, I don't really think about it. But I do know, like, he went through a phase to where I mean, again, like whenever we travel for him to go compete. It's like, again, we've been teaching now for four years. So it's like, that was literally like, the only time that we have like away from the students away from the dogs away from our routines where we're like, oh, we're in a hotel room and like, yeah, the mood is right. You know, like, yeah, tired and stressed out and like, having to go train and like, you know, I feel like we always like wanting to have sex, but, you know, then he there was a time where he was like, no, like, but I can't I can't I can't come because I want to save that for tomorrow. Like, okay, let's do all this stuff.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:42
That seems torture, though.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:45
You know, he I think that he still feels like, I think personally, he probably does no, like, if he doesn't, he feels better. So I mean, for me, I don't really care.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:52
You don't have a personal preference, but you know, yeah, I mean, everyone has, you know, their own thing. And I always say it on here. It's like if you think that not having sex makes you better than psychologically it probably does. You know, if you think it doesn't matter, then it probably doesn't matter. You're probably just gonna compete the same way you were okay. Is there any advice that you would give yourself? Now that you know what you know about fighting and love and romance? I love asking kind of like a fighting advice. But also, what would you tell younger Raquel about love and yourself and dating and whatnot?
Unknown Speaker 1:04:30
So someone actually asked me this. I can't remember when or but I basically like what I felt like at the time I said that like you're gonna be okay. Like, you're gonna be okay. Because I mean, you know, like, I mean, coming from me again, like I moved here with absolutely nothing and even before I came here, I left because I had nothing going on there. And I had hit like this really like rock bottom. Like, yeah, like really, I before I came here, I was like at rock bottom, like not to say that it was I got a, i, the family I was working for got divorced. So I lost my job. And then like some stuff happened. So I ended up leaving my team. And then my grandpa passed away. And they were like, a bunch of like, every single month, like something big was happening. And that's what kind of led me here. And just that, are you and I always tell like, how was never the one like all my friends always had people and I didn't have anyone and you just kind of said, Oh, what's going on? You know, so it was like, I I would tell myself, like, my younger self, like, you're gonna be okay. Like, everything's gonna like, exactly how your life is supposed to be.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:31
Yeah, I love that so much. And hopefully. Yeah, I mean, looking back now, I think that that's great advice for for any young person. You know, we're so stressed about what's going to happen in the future. It's actually hard to enjoy the president, right?
Unknown Speaker 1:05:46
For sure. I feel like I have a couple of friends right now that I mean, a lot of my friends are younger than I am. And I feel like I've taken on like a very long roll with them where I always had like, a lot of women that mothered me, and I can tell they're like, dude, like, you're gonna be okay. Like, stop stressing out like it's good. Yeah, I probably gonna be fine. Take it from the old woman. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:07
Oh, yeah. It's funny. How were the old, old, old women in the gym. Now I'm like, I was the young, like, talented up and coming. What I remember those days all day, I'm, I'm, I'm the veteran.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:19
I waited for the day when someone young walks in. And I'm like, I used to be young, quite.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:25
Honestly, I'm not there yet. Like, I see the young girls, and I'm just so happy for the sport. Oh, yeah. You know,
Unknown Speaker 1:06:32
I'm saying, like, you know, you know, like, when there's those uncles, they're like,
Unknown Speaker 1:06:36
Oh, for sure.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:38
So that's what I used to do, was, I used to be able to do that. And, you
Unknown Speaker 1:06:44
know, there's also going to be like, some kind of, like, a sigh of relief, when we do just be like, I'm fucking done, you know, because it's like, I don't even know if I truly enjoy my life. Because it's always like, in the back of my mind, like this time ticking down and like the opportunities. Do not
Unknown Speaker 1:07:01
ever say that it literally is a time ticking like, literally every single day, every single day. You can I can literally hear about it every day. I'm like, okay, you know, it's February now. It's March. Now. It's all it's December, every year.
Unknown Speaker 1:07:19
But I mean, at the end of the day, I know that we're both doing everything that we can. And that's just excess thoughts that if our 42 year old selves could talk to us, we probably could tell tell ourselves, you're gonna be okay. Yeah. But you're gonna be okay, ladies. Do you have a pet peeve in the bedroom? This is always a funny one. Because we've had the answer from bad breath all the way to, you know, a guy sticking in the back door without asking, which is a funny one, but it does.
Unknown Speaker 1:07:53
I actually, I don't really have like a pet pee. Like, it's not like he does anything. I mean, he knows we've been together for so long now that he does. But I have this thing where if I'm on bottom, and he does this to my head, like if he I always hit his head, like, I don't like that pressure on my neck crank. Kinda. I know. Like if he's like, kind of just like trying to hug me but he's like putting too much pressure on my head. I think that's like the only thing that I've ever liked.
Unknown Speaker 1:08:19
Sometimes, you know, in bed, like, obviously, my partner has a black belt as well. And, like, they'll just do certain things and like they're using the same grip that they would like. And I'm like, I know this is sex, but it feels like you're doing jujitsu. And then I always like to ask also, it's like, we have a lot of alphas, right? Alpha females alpha males on the show. And sometimes the bedroom is a place where if you are an alpha, you can kind of like let your guard down. Do you find yourself being just as dominant in the bedroom? Or is it a place where you can actually be a little bit more submissive?
Unknown Speaker 1:08:55
I think I'm I am more submissive, we always kind of joke around because like if we ever like in the past, like if we ever did roleplay I've always I'm the secretary. Old her boss. Always the older because I'm the older you found a common theme that I was always like that
Unknown Speaker 1:09:18
I'm the little dainty girl. Yeah, I for me, it's like I haven't really been like, dainty in my life. And so like just pretending that I'm just like, Oh, I'm I'm weaker. I'm dainty. It's different. Okay, so this is the part of show where we ask you some fan questions. But before we do that, for the people that are not going to switch over to the UFC fight pass platform, where can they follow you on all your social media handles? Where can they check out the gym? Feel free to give your Jim a shout out I'm so happy for you and Hanako because, you know love is hard and then opening a business together and then still not wanting to kill you kill each other, you know, like congratulations.
Unknown Speaker 1:09:59
Thank you. Yeah. I know that yesterday I was talking to him about something and I was like, Yeah, but you know, like, we need to make a decision together because I was like, You're my partner. He's like, I'm your partner. I'm like, Yes, sir. My part is like, I thought it was just an employee. So that's why we've made it so far is because I'm the owner and he's the employee and his. Me my instagram handle is still under my maiden name. So it's just Raquel pa Louie. And then you know, if you go there, I do have like, my website is just Raquel canuto.com. But it's all linked on there. And even for hybrid, it's under hybrid jujitsu. So you can I mean, everything is going to be on my Instagram.
Unknown Speaker 1:10:37
And then it's Checkmat Las Vegas, right? Yeah, so we are
Unknown Speaker 1:10:41
like the name of our gym is hybrid jujitsu. But then we are kind affiliate so we are like the Checkmat Las Vegas. We used to go by that name when we were in the venom gym, just so that we could kind of differentiate like ourselves from the that like the venom name. But now we are going more by hybrid but we are checking out Las Vegas like the Las Vegas chapter of Checkmat. Okay,
Unknown Speaker 1:11:01
awesome. All right. Well guys, follow her on all those social media handles. And then yeah, like anytime you're competing or fighting, we would love to promote you as well.
Unknown Speaker 1:11:34
Okay, that's it for episode 129 with Rock Hill, Pa Louis Canuto. Just a fun name to say in general. Like I said before, when we first started an inspirational person to me, and if she does get back out there and starts fighting, I will be front row center for that girl, guys, UFC fight pass is the world's premier combat sports streaming service with over 200 live events, the largest fight library in existence, original shows and more. Sign up for one year and get half off for a limited time at UFC fight pass.com backslash sign up. Okay, I'm very excited to tell you guys I've been holding this in. But next week we have on Zion Clark. If you don't know who that is, let me give you a little spiel. There's kind of a little bit from Wikipedia and a little bit from his website. He is an American wrestler, professional mixed martial artist and wheelchair racer who was born with no legs. In addition to his brutal training regimen, he stays busy as a motivational speaker. And the film Zion has garnered critical acclaim at the prestigious Sundance Film Festival in 2018. And is now available on Netflix. I have yet to watch this guy's but I have seen him on social media and I just fell in love with like I said with with the inspiration of just watching him do his thing. This man has no legs and it has not held him back in the slightest. Like I said professional mixed martial artists, wheelchair racer and motivational speaker. He's inspiring people by just being him and I'm honored to have someone like that on the show. And of course, your girl's gonna ask some probably questions that will make you guys go What the fuck Actually Did you just ask that? But yeah, I'm going to ask I so don't forget to tune into that episode. Next week. It will be the last episode before I head out to Colombia for stem cells. So that'll be a good one to kind of pause for a second, but we will be back. Don't worry. And you can you know, if you miss us, you can go to our website sex violence with rebel girl.com Pick up some merch. Or you can go to my exclusive phantom site, which is Ashley rebel girl.com. And yeah, if you really miss us, you can send us an email telling us how much you miss us or whatever, we don't care. We love the interaction guys. And a quick reminder, please rate and review the show. And that's about it. I love you guys for tuning in every week I love you for the fan questions you sent in that are still available on the UFC fight pass platform and just you know for helping me stay busy during the last two years that's really what this started as just a project to stay busy and hopefully it led to other things and two years later guys, here we fucking are. It kept me busy. It kept me mentally sane from not being able to compete and train and do what I love and guess what it led to some cool shit Your girl is now a cage side interviewer in cage interview are actually at this next fight Wish me luck. And and and I'm back and I'm back to fighting now. So thank you you know if I didn't have people listening and tuning in I would have I would have stopped because what the fuck because why? Why why do it so thank you guys. I truly truly mean that at all you guys listening right now? You guys are very special and very important to me. Thank you. I can't say it enough. You could check us out on social media always at sex and violence with rebel girl and myself at Ashley MMA. Huge thank you to our audio engineer DJs Oh, who's always holding it down. Check him out on social media at DJ Zol tomorrow kid studio at tomorrow kids official. I hope you guys enjoyed this week's guests. I fucking do. Remember, be kind, be grateful but don't take shit from anyone. Talk to you guys next week with a new guest. You know who it is, and more tales of sex and violence.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai