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Ep.43 Tay "Killa Bee" Starling

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Hey guys, welcome back to sex and violence with rebel girl where we interviewed top level MMA fighters and other experts in their field

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about love, dating, romance,

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and that also taboo subjects. I'm your host, Ashley, Rebel girl,

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Kevin Smith. Now let's talk about sex and violence. What's

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happening, hot stuff what's

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up on my naughty listeners? We are here again, deep diving into the lives of our guests. We scratch more than the surface and we interview and dig deep, deep, deep for the dirt that you guys really want to know. Let's face it. We specialize in fighters but we also bring you guests from all professions backgrounds and sexual preferences. We are back here at Black Belt collective Krav Maga in Huntington Beach, they have opened their doors once again, we are in a jam, we're looking for a new studio, but they have taken care of us so so well, we've got state of the art mics, the best sound equipment, and frankly, the vibe and the energy here from Abel, the owner has been so welcoming. We don't know what we would do without them. So give them a follow on Instagram. It's at Black Belt collective Krav Maga on Instagram. And then if you want to check out their website, it's www dot Huntington Beach self defense.com By the way, did you guys know that my bookie.ag is the best in online gaming, it's where you should be placing your bets and you get a 50% bonus match on your first deposit with code. Rebel girl

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this weekend we can make some cash together. But please honestly don't pick my picks because even though I'm learning you know, MMA is a crazy sport. There's you know, upsets there's eye pokes there's illegal strikes you just never know what's going to happen and I just don't want to be responsible for your bank account so if you put some money in right now use code rebel grow if you put $100 in you get 50 extra dollars you put $1,000 in you get 500 extra dollars that's a lot of money. I mean, I know all you guys are thinking about that stimulus check that's coming that's 14 $100 maybe you don't put the whole stimulus check to you know in your my bookie account, but you know, a couple 100 bucks, and then you use code rebel girl, you get another some more you know, half of that whatever you put in to play so if you want to play this weekend, we've got a card. It's pretty good card. I'm looking at the fight lineup right here. Okay, we got Derek Brunson and Kevin Hall in the main event. I don't know too much about Kevin Holland. I know he's been on a roll lately. He fought five times in 2020. And if you haven't seen him knockout jock array from the ground, I had to look up this clip me and my homie Brian were talking about this this morning. He is Joker raised in Kevin Hollins guard and he just throws up a haymaker and knocks him out off his back, but It's unheard of, you know, especially Jocko re who's you know he's not a scrub So Kevin Hollins got some massive power you know as a good striker within Derek Brunson. He's just the well known wrestler, so it's your traditional matchup wrestler versus striker not gonna bet on this. I just don't know. It could be anybody's fight. co main event we got greater good lips. Good a little bit. Gillespie versus Brad riddle. I'm not gonna lie. I don't know too much about those guys. I do know about this next fight though. tied to the ASA versus Don tolley, Maya's tall maze and tie to Vyasa this guy, I met him. They call him bam, bam, he's the Australian New Zealand. He's always hanging out with Tyson, Pedro. The other things are light heavyweight. But these guys are so so funny. I met them back in, like 2017 or 18 at the athlete retreat. And there's two guys that you want to hang out with there. If you don't know it. But Australians, they drink beer out of a shoe after they win a fight as like a celebration. And they call it a Shuey. And this guy does that after his fights. He's just you know, a jolly guy very funny. And you know, who doesn't want to see a big heavyweight guy drink beer out of a shoe. So I'm going for title USA. There's a couple other good fights on the card. Adrian Nunez versus Gustavo Lopez. This devil Lopez went to Menlo College with me. Carla Esparza Josh Emmett few other people and see who Oh three women's fights. We got Cheyenne byes versus Montserrat Ruiz, and I know this girl is actually we had Nick delete Nick Lee on last week and this is her friend on Instagram. Her name is koneko mad I think it's mad bunny or mad rabbit. But um, she took a short notice fight and so I'm not gonna go for her. So that's Nick Billy's friend. And then the other two girl fights are married renew who I fought before versus Macy chesson and Julia Abdullah versus Julia. Oh, god, I'm gonna kill this girl's last name. Sorry. stollery anko. She sounds Russian. But uh, I think this is two bantamweight fights. So that's my weight class, I'll be watching these like a hawk. What else is going on with me back to training, it's going to be you know, slow road but feels good to just be sore again and sore I am you know, I probably did like 10 squats and I'm dying today. But you know, a few more months and then I'll be able to hit pads and probably a few more months after that. I'll be back to to grappling and as I tell you every week you know the goal is to be back in the cage by the end of 2021. I'll keep you guys updated. And other than that, it's been same same here except for California is open. I don't know if it's fully open but restaurants and bars and gyms and some beauty salons they know or you know, you can eat inside normal I know it's not completely normal and I will still be social distancing as much as possible wearing our mask. I know some of you're probably starting to get vaccinations. I'm fucking scared because, you know, they probably just a conspiracy theory about you know if affects fertility and all that and I don't even want kids but I'm like, Alright, if it does affect fertility, what else does it mess up? So I'm not some crazy person over here. That's not gonna get vaccinated. But I do kind of want to be like, Alright, I'm gonna watch you guys and if you guys grow third arm, then I'm gonna pull pull back from vaccination, but it's just a weird world world we live in, right? So, you know, we're starting to get out of this crazy time, you know, crazy pandemic and there will always be some kind of remnants going on. I feel like you know, we'll probably have social distancing for for a while, but it feels good to get back to normal and I hope you guys are thriving, you know, with whatever you got going on. We also have a new CBD sponsor called a botanical bloom, I'm very happy to have them on board. They are made with real CBD, not hemp seed oil. And all their products are lab tested, and it's provided on their site. Actually, every product has a scannable barcode. So you can actually see the testing the specific testing for each product which is pretty cool. You know, it doesn't matter if you're a UFC athlete who gets randomly drug test or if you just really care about what's going in your body all you know all the products have that label. They have lip balms, the vapor rubs tinctures, gummies, and this is something new they have a CBD hand sanitizer. So right now we're in a pandemic, everyone's using the hand sanitizer. It's dries out your hands, right and then you smell your hands and it's all smells like alcohol or you know, whatever. This one moisturizes your hands and it smells like cucumber melon. So check it out guys, it's you can give them a follow up a botanical bloom on Facebook or at a botanical bloom on Instagram. And their website is www a botanical bloom, Bloom calm and you can use code Ashley MMA and you get 20% on all those products. I highly recommend the hand sanitizer. It's just you know, you got to do it anyway, you might as well get one that smells good and makes your hand soft. So

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Go ahead, visit llaparadis.com and use code rebel girl to save money on your next intimate purchase. Today's guest is a bare knuckle boxer who loves Krispy Kreme Doughnuts and butt rubs but who does this 25 year old single mother of two is also a baker, a barista a keg cleaner at a brewery when she's not grinding away at her nine to five, wrestling with her young boys and getting spontaneous tattoos. She's training non stop. She brings a stacked resume of Professional MMA, boxing kickboxing, and Bare Knuckle boxing to the table. And with that background, you may expect to hear a hard nosed gritty interview but prepare yourself to be surprised by a perky, playful and Goofy ass fleet, we talk about the pressures of only fans, bisexual tendencies, dating after divorce, micro penis horror stories buffle etiquette having her period on Fight Night and so much more. Here's your guest today killaby Starling.

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They will turn

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the bad

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guys Sacco and they suspended in the money. She's a knock.

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We don't you know? She's She's.

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She's an old Cadillac. She's a knockout.

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Killer beats darling, thank you so much for joining us. How are you?

Unknown Speaker 11:02
I'm fantastic. Thanks for having me. How are you today?

Unknown Speaker 11:05
I'm doing good. You

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know, Thursday's are recording days and I've been wanting to get you on for a while I've been following your bare knuckle career and you just seem like a cool girl You seem like a girl I would hang out with. If we lived close by like you would be my friend. And it's not just the tattoos.

Unknown Speaker 11:22
It's so funny because like, I've been obsessed with you forever. And like, I've always been like, gosh, I just want to be best friends with her. So we'll offer you to have me on here and it's such an honor. So thank you.

Unknown Speaker 11:32
No problem. Okay, well, let's get back to it. Let's get to talking about the violence aspect of the podcast. You are a badass Bare Knuckle boxer, but you have also fought professionally, professional boxing and MMA. So I want to know why did you make the switch?

Unknown Speaker 11:50
Okay, so I have fought in all disciplines, other than like karate, and like, I don't, I don't even know kung fu. But I've done kickboxing, boxing, MMA and just there was always something missing. And it was kind of like, it felt like I was forcing myself to do those things. But when I saw Bare Knuckle first come out, I was like, Oh, that's my kind of fighting. Um, but my coach at the time just advised against age like you're crazy. If you want to do that you're asking to get killed. And I'm like, No, like something about that just screams me. Because I loved a brawl. Yeah. And I did every discipline and just every single thing like it was fun, but it felt like something was missing. And when I went to bare knuckle and fall in February, like I was I felt like I was home I was like, I've been like this is perfect. Perfect for me. Yeah.

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So I watched that fight. Amazing fight. Congrats, by the way. I was I didn't watch the whole card. But I was doing you know, a read up on the card and they said that you and your opponent stole the show. It was just a bloody back and forth war. At one point they thought you know, you had her she was and then she just came back harder. And you guys got a crowd standing ovation. Tell me how that fell.

Unknown Speaker 13:03
It was wild because I felt like I felt like I felt like shit. Honestly. Like I was like, cuz it was so brutal and so hard. And like, I look around, and people were standing and then I see like Shaquille O'Neal like standing on my dog. Wow. Like it must have been like a pretty decent fight. Yeah, Shaq was there. Anthony Pettis was there. Like all these people that I didn't even know were there. Um, it was just really awesome. So it was cool. I but I really had no idea that it was a show ceiling performance. Like when the President David Feldman came up to me as I was standing in the ring and was like you just got Fight of the Night hand down. And I don't even need to see the rest of the card. Wow. It was such a huge moment and you know, to be someone who you know faces a lot of adversity and stuff outside of the gym and like grinding for something that I see for my future was definitely really cool to have it just pay off.

Unknown Speaker 14:02
Yeah, so is Bare Knuckle similar to UFC where if you get a performance of the night or knockout of the night do they give you extra money?

Unknown Speaker 14:10
Oh yeah. Which was really nice because it was very much so needed my car like took a shit on me like the month before I left like I had to drive my dad's old beater truck that had like 307,000 miles on it and my car was just done for so that bonus was much needed

Unknown Speaker 14:27
It's so crazy right we we've chosen these professions where it's like we put ourselves in those positions right where we have to drive like a shit car and then we work our butts off and then like when we when we you know get to pay off our shit car or get a better car right but it's like we don't have to have these jobs we could easily you know go get a nine to five and have some steady you know, probably boring but like more financially consistent job but instead, we're a little crazy and we choose to live this life. But you know when when something like that happens, right when you get perfect. Four months of the night, and a standing ovation, I feel like those are the moments where you're like, you look at everybody, and you're like, this is why I choose this crazy profession.

Unknown Speaker 15:08
Exactly. Like I said, it was just that moment of like, I knew what I saw in myself that maybe other people didn't see. And like, I knew what I was working for. And just to have it all pay off was like hell yeah.

Unknown Speaker 15:21
Because there's so many doubts, right? Like, yeah, it's a roller coaster of emotions, like you and I both know, and fighters it you know, from the minute you accept the contract, you're like, oh, maybe, okay, okay. And then, you know, you're training and then you have moments of like, I'm not ready, and then you, you know, you prepare, and you get more ready and you feel more confident, but then the way cut, you know, it's just a roller coaster. And then when you win, it's like, okay, like, everything was worth it. Right?

Unknown Speaker 15:46
Yeah. And I it's one of the things I feel like people don't get to really experience is like, how, it's not just physical. It's not just training, it's emotional. It's mental. You've got 100 people telling you, you're an idiot, and what are you doing this floor and like, that just are trying to bring you down and like that stuff really takes a toll on you. So, yeah, that kind of moment happened. Like,

Unknown Speaker 16:09
I don't know who's telling you, you're an idiot. But you should distance yourself from that person. Yeah, right. Right. That's definitely something I've done this year, is, you know, even if there's some people around me who's a little bit negative, I'm like, you know, what, I'm only gonna surround myself with positive people, right? The people that are doing the things that I want to do, or the people that you know, are have the same work ethic and that kind of thing. So I'm really proud of you, I read about your story. I know that you're a single mom. And so I can only imagine that, that this when and all the media attention that you're getting is, is making that single mom life easier.

Unknown Speaker 16:44
Yeah, it's awesome. It's so awesome. And thank you so much. Yeah, it's unreal. Because I tell people every single day like being a mom that my children are what I do it for and like I them, everyone's always like you want, you want to make a lot of money, right? You want to get a world title, right? And I'm like, What I really want is just to show my kids that if you go for your dreams, and what you want to do, like you can do anything you want, you can achieve anything you want. If you work hard, and be a good person and go for it, then you can do that. And that's really all that I'm trying to achieve. The other stuff that comes along with it is great. But to me, this is like a mission for my kids to be like yeah, your mom did it. Like oh, yeah,

Unknown Speaker 17:29
I'm sure if they don't you know, they're young right now. Right? How old are they?

Unknown Speaker 17:34
Yeah, they're three and five.

Unknown Speaker 17:35
Yeah, like, I'm sure they're, you know, they don't really know exactly what's going on right now. But as soon as they get to that level, where they realize like, my mom is a badass, like, I'm sure they're and that made me very proud of you at their little age. But you know, there's gonna come a point when they're in that like preteen where they're like, Whoa, my mom is a professional boxer like that. You know, like other moms.

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I'm pretty sure my five year olds gone to school and been like they're not mess with me because my mommy will beat you up.

Unknown Speaker 18:02
Yeah. So for your last fight was you know you just seemed even though you're hard on yourself, you had a great performance you got the bonus is Was there anything that didn't go your way during like maybe the the wakeup or the fight camp?

Unknown Speaker 18:16
Oh, man, I had like, this is so much like being a woman. I don't think a lot of people see the true inside of being a woman in fighting. I started my period, like the day before, weigh ins. And it had to be like, TMI, but like it had to be the absolute worst period I've ever had in my entire life of ever having periods. There's no to this show. So I don't know why I said that. Yeah, I started my period, and it was fucking awful. And it was the most miserable period I've ever had. And that just like, threw a wrench in my whole week was so amazing. And then that happened. I was like, fuck.

Unknown Speaker 18:58
So, you know, it's weird, because I'm a professional fighter. I've been fighting professionally since I was 23. But you know, weird, you know, TMI, but don't give a fuck, I don't have my physical period, right? Like, I'm, I have hormones, I'm a woman and all that, but I haven't got my period in many, many years. So, you know, it's a blessing because I don't have to deal with the, you know, the physical mess of the situation, right? Like, I'm sure I still retain water. I know, I'm emotional. Probably even more so than someone who, you know, has their period obviously, but when you're experienced, like, what are the biggest downfalls of being on your period? I mean, because you know, the guys out there they're like, whatever you know, so you believe from your vagina no big deal right? But what does that entail? Like what obstacles does that add to the already difficult pneus of cutting way and preparing for the fight?

Unknown Speaker 19:48
Well, man, like you Your body is retaining water like you'd like you retain water so you're trying to cut weight Make sure your weights on point and, and it was like I had to calculate like, okay, I weigh this much, but I just started my period. And I know that I gained this much during my period. And to make sure that my weight was gonna be on point while I was on my period, and then I'm a freaking psychopath on my period, like a psychopath. So I'm emotional. And then I feel disgusting. So like I had way in the day after I started my period, which is like the worst day of my period. And I had like this hot little number, like planned out, and I still look good. But I didn't get to wear exactly what I wanted to. Because I was like, Listen, I'm going out here and a phone, my ass cheeks are about to be on full display. And then my period was like, I don't think so. Okay. I had to like, change that up. And then of course, like, I'm going to fight and actually forgot my fucking tampons. So I had to have one of my one of my my coaches, like, go out and get me tampons and his responses. Like, I'm like, you look, you gotta go get me tampons right now. I forgot them. He's like, What flavor do you want? Oh, my God. What fucking flavor do I want? I don't know, just get something so that like, I'm not bleeding on myself. I mean, I was bleeding on myself in my fight. But like, I was more worried. I didn't know that was just like, I don't want to be I don't want to be on TV was like a giant period. sayin and everybody like, make out the mean. But honestly, my fight wouldn't have seen it anyway.

Unknown Speaker 21:19
It was a bloody fight regardless of what's going on downstairs. Right? Yeah, God, yeah, that's hilarious. And, and the thing is that, you know, the weight cut the mental aspect of it. People always talk about breaking right, like, Oh, so and so didn't make weight because he or she broke, right? Like, it's, it's hard. You know, you get to this point where you're starving yourself. You know, if you do it, right, you don't have to starve yourself. But you know, we all know that on even on the most professional level UFC, there's still people that are starving themselves and doing it really, in an unhealthy way. So it's just God, it sucks so bad, because it's like it's already mentally and emotionally stressful, right? And then you throw in all our crazy period emotions. It's like, dude, I guarantee there's not you know, a guy out there. Well, there's some tough guys, but most guys wouldn't be able to hack it going through the week. Yeah. And the fight camp on your period. It's, it's rough.

Unknown Speaker 22:14
And it's like, the craziest thing is I don't know what kind of Juju magic or whatever is going on in the world. But it seems like every single fucking time I fight I have my period. It like never fails. I'm like, Ah, good thing. I know how to handle this now. Like, I've always, it's always lined up. And I'm like, Really?

Unknown Speaker 22:33
Yeah. It probably has something to do with like, you know, your hormones. Like when you when you get ready for a fight, you know, like, you know, your go up, they go down. So I don't even know, you know, I'm not a doctor, but I just know it sucks. And it's something that men are very lucky they have to deal with when they're getting ready for their fight.

Unknown Speaker 22:50
Oh, absolutely. Alright, guys,

Unknown Speaker 22:51
don't worry. We're done talking about periods. But on a sexier note, you have an only fans account. This is a big hot topic right now with the female fighters specifically because, you know, I don't I don't know if there's a lot of guy fighters. I know. Bare Knuckle boxer. Tyler good. JOHN actually has one. But it's mainly female fighters that are utilizing this platform. What's been your experience? using the platform? Is it good? Is

Unknown Speaker 23:15
it bad? It's got it's good. And it's bad. Because I you know, being a single mom and working all the jobs I do, like I really use it for like an extra source of income. Like it's really helpful, but it's great to also be personable with fans or anybody, but then you got like, people don't realize like the people that messaged me for like personal content, which like I'm really really careful with. And like I don't I don't send things out. I don't do nudes and things like that personally, because one I'm a mom, too. I just I don't want to getting weak like things like that. But you know, people don't realize they're messaging you asking you for butthole pictures but there's also 100 other people messaging me asking me for butthole pictures and I'm just like, Listen guys, I can't I can't just show all you people my butthole okay,

Unknown Speaker 24:08
but it's what it is. It's like you know, like yeah,

Unknown Speaker 24:12
like for me like I know a lot of fighters like Jessica I think she has because she's like you're not gonna see me naked. It's like yeah, I put good stuff on there like my bare ass is on there. There's really risque like super risque stuff on there. That I'm like, Okay, I think this is personal and you guys get to pretty much see everything without seeing everything Yeah, um, so it's it's that for me is

Unknown Speaker 24:36
implied nude that's what we just learned with our last guest Nick delay she said it's called implied nude Where? You know, maybe like you're holding your nipples or like, you know, yeah, you're fully naked but there's like a banana in front of your book crackers. So

Unknown Speaker 24:49
yeah,

Unknown Speaker 24:49
I just thought about Austin Powers. But yeah. Okay, so implied new. That's cool. Like I think all the guys and girls to you know, whoever wants to To see your pictures, it's like whenever I have a guest that has an only fans, the questions I get, like, what do we get when we who we subscribe to their only fans? And I'm like,

Unknown Speaker 25:09
Yeah, okay, like you definitely get good stuff on my page. It's just like if you ask me for a picture of me, like I had someone asked me for like a video of me naked shadowboxing but showing my butthole and I'm like, I have way too much shit going on in my day to like, and I like that, to me, it makes me giggle. Like I understand, but I'm like, I just can't like think about myself like getting butt ass naked hitting pads and like bending over my butthole and like taking it seriously. Oh, you know, it's so funny.

Unknown Speaker 25:40
You say that I was scrolling through my Instagram last night. And you know, I control the sex and violence Instagram myself. Some people may think that it's somebody else, but it's really me. And it's funny because I have my personal account. And then I have the sex and violence account and on the sex and violence account. I follow like, just like all like sexual accounts like relationship stuff, right? And like a fighter girls and fighter guys. And I was scrolling and I was seeing like, a lot of girls like doing their only fan stuff. And I just had this like, realization of like, okay, let's say I want to have an only fans like I don't for like my own personal reasons. Like I'm super, super fucking shy and yada yada. Well, there's, there's a lot of reasons why I don't want to have one. But let's just say I wanted to have one. I'm like, I don't want to like do my makeup and then like, get costumes ready. And then like, hold my selfie stick like and then like, arch my back. I'm like,

Unknown Speaker 26:27
yeah,

Unknown Speaker 26:27
that does not sound fun to me. Like,

Unknown Speaker 26:29
I'm kind of like there's there's a lot of pressure on that because like, I'm like, I first I was doing it like before my bare knuckle fight like, oh, maybe like I can get some money and blah, blah, blah. Whoever wants to see I didn't really have a lot of followers. But once my following blew up, someone was like, you should post it. I bet you'd make some money. I'm like, Yeah, absolutely. So I did. And now I feel like this constant pressure to post something every single day. And like, make sure I look hot and make sure that I'm making the best laundry and, um, but you know, yeah, there's a lot of work,

Unknown Speaker 26:59
you know, like you and I both know, it's like, it shouldn't be that right? It should be, yeah, fun, extra source of income, where Jessica, I've actually the way she put it, it's just was just, I just got pen. And one of them. They both have one. But they're like, It's me, like embracing my sexuality and like feeling good about myself and just, you know, showing my sexuality the way that I want to and I'm like, Yeah, like, and that's why, like, just because I'm saying like, I don't want one. I'm all for it. You know, one question that does pop into my head though, cuz you have a kid. I'm like, Do you ever think like, okay, like in 10 years, you know, like little what's your I don't, you know, like little Johnny's friends could be like, yeah, sorry, my butthole you know, or, like, you know, I saw her like, implied nude pictures or whatever. Is that like, yeah, Does that ever pop into your head at all?

Unknown Speaker 27:45
Oh, absolutely. Like, I would be lying if I said it, did it. But it's like, you know, Mama got bills to pay. Yeah, yeah. toys you like but it's like, I don't I honestly, I don't want them to come out. And that might sound bad. But it's like, and I think of it this way. Like, there's strippers. There's people who work in the sex industry and things like that, that are moms and like, you know what, like, I don't post anything. I mean, they might see like, yeah, implied nudes, but do butthole but I'm like, Yeah, it's definitely a battle like I battle myself with and I'm sure that I will get backlash, and I'd probably have gotten backlash on shit for doing it. But you know what? pay my bills. It's exactly what you said that

Unknown Speaker 28:31
yeah, exactly what you say. It's like, hey, you're not paying my bills, shut the fuck up. Like, and that's what it comes down to. And, you know, I think you're killing it. So,

Unknown Speaker 28:39
but let's, let's

Unknown Speaker 28:39
dig a little deeper. So I want to know, how do you identify sexually? Are you straight by pansexual asexual?

Unknown Speaker 28:48
I'm straight. But I've definitely had like lesbian tendencies. Like, and that's just, I don't mean that in like an offensive way if that like offends anybody, but like, I'm straight. I've never been in a relationship with a girl. But I've definitely made out with lots of girls. I've hooked up with girls. Especially like when I'm drinking. I love girls if I'm to like watch porn. I watch girls like, yeah, it's like that inner like I love I love me about bitch like,

Unknown Speaker 29:17
do you ever like oh, here this is why, like when I remember a couple years ago, like I had done my little like hookup stage with girls when I was drinking. And then I'm like, Okay, I gotta ask myself this deep question. Like, am I bisexual? And I just don't want to like admit it like, and then like, I realized I'm like, okay, I've never looked at a girl and said, like, I want to do something sexual with her. It's always been like, oh, her hair looks pretty. Oh

Unknown Speaker 29:38
my gosh. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 29:39
It's like, I admire them, but I don't desire them in a sexual way. And I'm like, all right, like just because you like hook up with a girl. When you're intoxicated doesn't mean you're secretly bisexual. But you know, yeah. Would you ever have you ever like looked at a girl and been like, oh, like, I would like to lick her box.

Unknown Speaker 29:58
Do something physical with her.

Unknown Speaker 30:00
I'd be lying if I said no, but it's always like, especially like, when I drink alcohol. I'm like, oh, like, I would, I would make out with her. I'm gonna do that, like, I've done that, but I've like, but I don't have a desire to, like, be romantically like in a relationship with a female just because like, I'm fucking crazy. And I don't know if I could handle another crazy female code. I mean, like, um, but I definitely like I appreciate women and like, I think I got like I said, I love a bad bitch. And like, I will I always if I see someone, I will let them know that I think they're beautiful. And if I'm drunk, we might be making out like,

Unknown Speaker 30:37
Yeah, you got to be careful. I I'm very complimentary to to like other women. And you know, yeah, sometimes guys, but not really, guys, because guys will take like, Hey, nice shoes as you want to fuck. And you're like, No,

Unknown Speaker 30:47
man. I

Unknown Speaker 30:48
just Yeah, nice shoes. Like, but exactly, yeah. But with women, you know, you know, I'll compliment them. And my boyfriend laughs at me because he's like, you have no gaydar. Like, what do you mean? And like, at least you know him. And I've been dating for over a year now. And at least three or four times. I'm like talking to a girl and like, I don't even drink anymore. So it's not like I'm intoxicated. I'm just friendly and complimentary. And then like, a couple hours in, she's like, got her arm around me. And I'm like, in my head. I'm like, this is my new best friend. And then my boyfriend's like, Yeah, she wants to lick your box. And I'm like, no. And then like, two more hours later, she's like, kissing me on the cheek. And I'm like, Oh,

Unknown Speaker 31:22
she wants to Oh, she wants to.

Unknown Speaker 31:25
So I don't have a gaydar. So I try to like, even not be as complimentary. But it sounds like yeah, drinking maybe, you know, want to just express that, like, you know,

Unknown Speaker 31:34
exactly. Yeah. It's like me and normal like me. not normal, sober. Like, I'm like, I appreciate females, but I'm like, No, but definitely when I drink I'm like, let's make out.

Unknown Speaker 31:47
So are you dating anybody? Right now?

Unknown Speaker 31:49
Are you saying I am? I am dating. So yeah, I'm dating somebody. Hmm.

Unknown Speaker 31:55
Okay, what's that? What's going on there?

Unknown Speaker 31:58
Um, I don't really kiss Intel. But um, I, I've been just like, enjoying my life for what it is, like I spent last year getting a divorce and doing all of that, and really finding myself and getting that together. And so it's been really fun to just like, enjoy another human, like, on my own terms and like, the way that I want to Yeah, so that's like, that's been great. Good. You know, sounds like you know, I

Unknown Speaker 32:28
don't want to dig too deep. But how long did it take you? From your divorce to you know, finalization, whatever you call her to jump back on the bandwagon and jump back on the horse and date? Like, did you take any downtime? Or did you just get right back? Right, right back out there.

Unknown Speaker 32:43
Um, I want to say right back out there, like, I definitely went right back out there. You know, it was just like a year of like, really figuring out like, all the crazy shit and finding myself and what I wanted to do. And I think after being married, I was kind of like, trying to force myself to basically, I don't want to say like, be a servant, but I guess that's what I would say. Like, I felt like I just had to do things. Like I just had to, I needed I needed love. And I needed someone there and as what I felt like, and then finally came a time, like a breaking point where I was like, okay, like, I need to figure out being on my own and paying bills on my own and like, just being by myself. And then once I figured that out, it just made it a lot sweeter to like, do things on my own terms and not in like, an emotionally traumatic state.

Unknown Speaker 33:32
Yeah, yeah.

Unknown Speaker 33:32
That makes sense. No,

Unknown Speaker 33:34
it's good. You said you just jump right back on the horse. But there was a year did you wait a year before you start dating? Is that what I'm understanding? Or no, you know, and it was,

Unknown Speaker 33:42
I was right into it. I was right into it, like right after. And then like, it was just, it was good. And then it was bad. And it was good. And like, it just was a mess. I get the whole, like, I could say I could probably take up the rest of your time telling this long story of everything. But

Unknown Speaker 33:59
But we think we know, right where it needs to be. Yeah, you know, we all have different stories, but for the most part, we we all kind of win whether it's a divorce or a breakup. I feel like a lot of us maybe not everybody, but a lot of us are like, Oh no, who's gonna love me now? Like, you know, yeah, we go to the extreme and then like, someone comes along, who's even better than the last person you're like, Oh, I am worthy of love. And it's just like this, you know, journey after you after you, you know, end a relationship about realizing that you're good enough and you know, everybody is not meant to be and, and whatnot. So you're on that you're on that path

Unknown Speaker 34:33
and you found something. I think once you find yourself worth and you realize like, I don't need a man. But I want a man like that's a different Yeah, it's like a different kind of feeling. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 34:46
I resonate with that I was sober for four months. And I was out of a relationship and I was like, Oh, you know what, like, this is great. This learning to be alone, right and appreciating your alone time because I'm kind of person. I don't know if you are like this as well, you kind of sound like it, but you hate to be alone, you know? Oh, yeah. So it's like I would jump from one relationship to the next not working on myself. And then you know, we do this weird transference, right? where it's like, maybe you and your ex, you know, let's say your ex husband had physical violence in the relationship, right? Like, I'm just for example, yeah. And then the next boyfriend, you jump right into it, and like, you know, he starts to yell at you. And you, you transfer the old relationship habits and so you think he's gonna be violent, and it's just, that's the, the reason why we should take time in between relationships, right to work on exact work on and you know, and so, that's something that I did for four months. And that was very long for me. And then I found my current partner, and you know, we're happy but, you know, four months, four months for me was was enough. You know, sometimes people take a year, sometimes people like, you jump right back into the relationship. But, you know, if things are going good, then, you know, that's all you can ask for.

Unknown Speaker 35:55
Right? Exactly, exactly. Yeah, I just taken that time to really, like, focus on myself focus on what I wanted, what I needed. What, like, I just had never spent that time alone. I was married for a long time. Just did not take a pause. Yeah. And like, I finally got to take that pause, and it was like, Whoa, like, okay, I really can do this on my fucking Oh, like, it's so but then but it's, but it's better when you have somebody that like, you know, can help you on your journey, you know,

Unknown Speaker 36:21
you want exactly you don't want someone to do it for you, but she wants a support system, right? Your team is on you and your partnership, your team, they should make you better and, and I remember being you know, in relationships in the past and, and just carrying the fucking team, and not really realizing like, Hey, honey, better teammates. And, yeah, and I think, you know, like, you had this realization when you, you know, break up or get a divorce. And it's like, you're your own team. But it's so much better to have a good teammate on your team, right?

Unknown Speaker 36:50
Yeah. Especially like, Yeah, when you have someone that realizes, like, we got to do this together, like and, like, makes you realize, like, we're doing this together and like, really support sides. It makes a huge difference. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 37:01
so I won't I won't dive too deep into this relationship. It sounds like it's new. But what about like, in the past? Can I ask about any, you know, dating experiences like, what's let's let's talk about kind of like one of your worst dating experiences does one come to mind where you're just like,

Unknown Speaker 37:17
oh, gosh, I there was like a phase when I was like a teenager. I was like, 1819 and like, I'm doing things that I was being bad. This was more of like a dating like single doing wild shit like I cuz I've never really I've always been in like committed relationships. So this is a good story from like, like, I just a nightmare date from when I was being like, in my whole face.

Unknown Speaker 37:45
Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 37:47
Yeah, I was going on a blind date that my sister set me up on and I was like, in Florida, on vacation, like, yeah, this guy wants to meet you and take you out. Go. Well, I'm like, okay, so we go and this guy's like, completely on interested. Like, fucking just leaves me Believe me hang in in this bar. And like I was underage drinking. I wasn't I shouldn't have been doing that. But I was at a bar and they were serving me drinks. And I'm this guy leaves me hanging. And then this other guy comes up. He's like, Whoa, like spitting all this game to me. I'm like, hell yeah. Like this guy's amazing. He like bought me drink. So of course, I like 1819. I'm like, Whoa, this is like the greatest thing in the world. Yeah. This man's buying me drink. Yeah, I never had a man buy me a drink. super special. Our standards are very low at 18. I'm like, oh, man, I want to marry him. He like, anyways, this guy's spitting mad games. Awesome. buying me drinks. And in my head. I made the decision. I'm like, all right. I'm gonna fuck this guy. Like if he wants to hook up with me, like, I'm gonna hook up with him. And long story short, the night goes on. And we ended up going back to my sister's and I'm like, Yeah, like, I want you and this guy is like, Whoa, I have something to tell you. And I'm like, Okay, cool. And he's like, I'm a virgin. I'm like, oh, like that's so sweet. Like you know i don't know if you want me to take your virginity like I will absolutely give it to you right? Yeah, like I have no problems doing that and then all of a sudden he's like okay, any like we go to hook up and this man has like a fucking micro penis. Like no fucking joke the smallest tick I've ever seen it like I'm not like shaming people with small penises but it was just like, oh, okay, like this is why you're a virgin and like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with this like it was just kind of like the most like the it was the biggest just letdown because like, I had gotten gassed up all night long. And like my whole like, I was so ready for this. And then it was just like, wow, okay, brakes, the brakes.

Unknown Speaker 39:59
I had to Google I had to Google what exactly a micro penis is. I mean, I've heard of this and I do know the thing I remember actually looking into it cuz I was watching this episode of my guy with her name's Jessica day. New Girl new girl. Yeah, so today Chanel says episode of new girl and this like hot guy. Like they go back to their her place and he like takes his boy takes his pants off. He's like, I have to tell you, I have a micro penis. And she's like, I'm sure it's not that bad. And then like, you see it and you're like, Oh, that's a thing. And so I googled it and it says, fun fact, an adult penis is considered abnormally small if it measures less than three inches, about eight centimeters when erect.

Unknown Speaker 40:40
Okay, yeah, so I absolutely saw a micro penis, like right in front of my face, like, and like, you know, I'm like, I was younger, and I like seeing this thing. And I'm like, this is not real life. And like, I'm again, like, I'm really not trying to just like shame people, because, like, they have no control over that. But that was my experience of like, you know, just expecting this like, big thing at the end of my nine. And it was like, it was like a firework that like, wasn't done. Okay. Well, like when I was like, five.

Unknown Speaker 41:09
So did you guys do like, you know, like milestone, or like, hands down?

Unknown Speaker 41:13
Like, did you just like, I'd be like, it was really like sad because like, the guy kind of like knew, like, Oh, she's not interested. And I was just like, I'm sorry. Like, I know, I'm like, really like fucking out because I'm like, I'll never tell anybody about your micro penis. And here I am. Years later, like, I saw a baby. Oh, my God.

Unknown Speaker 41:38
I mean, it's not like you're telling his name, and you're being really nice. Yeah. But I was like, I was like, Whoa, did you like, you know, like, wiggling around or something?

Unknown Speaker 41:47
Like, I don't know, sir.

Unknown Speaker 41:51
I just stared at it was like, This is no real life right now. Like, you know, but dating, like, I've, I've definitely had my share of dating, like, just douchebags and like, just normal. Like, you know, and like, another thing that's really hard with dating for me is people who can handle the fight game, can or

Unknown Speaker 42:13
can't,

Unknown Speaker 42:15
can and can't like both. Like, that's, it's like, I've had a really hard time like my marriage, like, me and my ex husband, we are on pretty good terms. But that's one of the things that was hard in our marriage was like, he just couldn't understand, like, why I felt the way I did about fighting. And then like, and I don't think men realize like, it's a lot like so many people that I can handle that. And then like, I'm like, No, I'm really like a fucking alphabet. Like, you got to be able to

Unknown Speaker 42:44
out for me, basically, it's weird, because you have to, like, you know, I feel this, I feel the same way. But it's also if you get another like, if you say you're an alpha male, well, you are an alpha female, right? And then you date another alpha male. That doesn't necessarily it's not always a recipe for good. Yeah, for good. Because if they're not sensitive to your extreme emotional, you know, ups and downs of the fight camp roller coaster, then it's just like, butting heads constantly. So, you know, you and I and a lot of other women are who are fighters are like looking for this like, perfect mate of like, alpha male, but also like sensitive, loving kind. It's just like, that's really fucking hard to find.

Unknown Speaker 43:25
Exactly.

Unknown Speaker 43:25
I get you on that. So So you're saying that being a fighter and your career has has definitely gotten in the way of your, your romance life?

Unknown Speaker 43:33
Yeah, like it I've had, I've, I think I've found the balance now of someone who definitely understands it. But I've definitely had people not understand it. And it's been, that's been a big battle, because I've always said, like, fighting will be here before you and fighting, we'll be here after you. So you know, we got to find our happy medium.

Unknown Speaker 43:53
how this is gonna work. It's hard. Because I think, you know, at least for the people that I know, men and women, you tend to want someone who understands. So you end up dating someone in your career, you know, and maybe they're in the same organization, or maybe they're in the same gym, and it's just like, you know, then if it doesn't work out, it's just a whole slew of problems, right? But at the end of the day, yeah, your heart is in the right place. You just want to find love and be happy, but it's like, Fuck, now, I got to see this guy on the other side, every day. So like, that's a common problem, but Okay, so you date, you know, are you used today, you know, in person, like, you know, traditional old school, but I feel like nowadays, it's all about the DMS, right, slash DMS. So do you guys especially now that you're getting this great media attention? Do you guys slide into your DMS trying to hit on you that way?

Unknown Speaker 44:42
Yeah, absolutely. And like my response to that is I've always just been like, especially when like the DM thing, I started picking up. I was like, I don't want to be 100 years old and like telling my grandchildren like I met him. He slid into my DMS and said he wanted to see my butthole The story I want. And I'm like such a romantic like I, I live for the See you in person and you look into my eyes and we just know that we're the one like, I want something like that I don't want, I don't want like, Oh, I he slid in my DMS and told me some fucking lame ass joke but I mean, I do have a lot of people thought in my DNS and I understand like, that's people saying and that's like, what's going on nowadays? I'll tell people, it's uh, it's, it's not as hard people I like you said like, you're shy. People are shy. And it's a lot easier to go online and be like, just say whatever you want, and not really have to give a fuck I'm not sure.

Unknown Speaker 45:38
I'm definitely not

Unknown Speaker 45:42
have a podcast about bubbles if I was shy, but you know, I think that it's just a different, a different culture. It's a different time, right? Like, we didn't you know, they're never used to be technology and social media. So you had to go up to a girl and ask her out or a boy and ask him out. And now it's just, you know, the network, you know, what's Generation X? Or what? What's the New Generation Z? Why I don't watch

Unknown Speaker 46:04
one of the alphabet, letters in the alphabet.

Unknown Speaker 46:07
z Oh, so Generation Z, this these guys with all the fucking you know, like, all they know, is Tinder and Bumble and the dating apps. And so it's like, it's like, it's disappointing. Really, you know, because I feel like it takes so much more for a man to walk up to a woman or a woman to walk up to a man, you know, because even that guy that's, that's going against, like, traditional gender roles are like, Oh, you know, you're an aggressive female. If you go up and you ask a guy out, and some men are like, that. They don't like that. And I'm like, Are you fucking kidding me? Like, I'm doing all the work for you?

Unknown Speaker 46:38
Yeah. Like, yeah, I couldn't get any easier. But like, It's wild to me. Because as young as I am, like, I've never once been on Tinder or anything like that. Like, there's been points where I like, wanting to get on there just to like, see the craziness. Yeah. Yeah, like, I just like seeing, like, the wild stuff that people put in their bios. And like, I'm, I love to, like, people watch. So. Um, yeah, that was like, the only reason I ever would have possibly wanted to have one. But other than that, like, I couldn't possibly fathom, like a man just like, not, like wooing me over the internet. I just don't.

Unknown Speaker 47:14
Yeah, and you know, just like regular text messages. Sometimes things get misconstrued in, in theology. Right? Wow. Well, so I've been asking this question lately. And I love it. Because I'm like, Oh, god, it's, it's, I'm 33. And you're 2525. So you know, what? Would What do you put up? What did you use to put up with when you were younger, like in the dating scene that you wouldn't put up with now? Like, I know, back in the day for me, it was like, Oh, he doesn't have to have a job. It's okay. You know, you don't have to have a car. And it's just like, now I'm like, I really set the bar real low back then, you know, and so yeah, I've got like these prerequisites, right for my partner, and like, finally found this great guy, but it's like, I had to raise the bar. So did you? Was there ever a time in your life where you're like, wow, like I really was?

Unknown Speaker 48:07
Yeah, um, you know, the, like, this is like, so, like you said earlier, like, Oh, well, we ever said or set pretty young at a young age. Yeah. I always look for somebody who has a sense of humor. And like, I just can't, like someone's got to have like, they got to be outgoing. Um, I've been with someone who wasn't outgoing. And like, I mean, like, obviously, I want I need a man that stable and himself, but like personality, trait wise, and like, things like that. Like, I need someone who can take a joke and like, make like, I've always said, I want to be with somebody who could make me laugh at least once a day. I want someone who can just make me really laugh once a day, even on like, my worst day. And I'm just an outgoing personality. I've been with someone in a serious relationship that just I could not even say hi to a stranger. And that like really bothered me. Yeah, cuz I'm, I'm the opposite. I'm super outgoing. Like, I don't I'm not scared to talk to people or go up and speak to people because it's, I just think that's just a good way of living. So that to me, like, I can't be with someone who just has absolutely no personality or outgoingness about them. Yeah, I

Unknown Speaker 49:16
think, you know, especially for for men and women who do the sports that we do the career that we've chosen. It's so intense, right? There's so much like it just intensity, right? It's just like hard training and, you know, not gonna recover and you got to get good night's sleep. So if you can find someone that like, just jokes around and like makes your life like, not so serious. It's it's Yeah, and absolutely, it doesn't. Like I've realized, over the years, it doesn't necessarily mean that this person has to be like, Oh, that's the funny guy, right? Because I have a connection with someone what I realize is, you know, maybe they're not like, you know, you wouldn't describe the person as a funny person. But when you have that connection, you guys start to have your inside jokes, right. That like Yeah, just be talking and then you'll start laughing and like no one else really knows what the fuck is going on. But you guys got your inside joke. And to me that's like, okay, maybe my partner is not like the funny guy, but we make each other laugh right we have our Exactly. And that's really important. Yeah, too.

Unknown Speaker 50:14
As long as I'm laughing. Yeah, like, I just want to laugh. That's the one thing I asked for.

Unknown Speaker 50:19
Yeah, me and me and my boyfriend went last night I said something. We're joking. Like, it was like evil or anything like that. But we're, I looked at him and I was like, I think have it. I think the goal, or like, the point of having a best friend is just laughing at the same stuff and like or like hating the same people or you know what I mean? Like, yeah. We're just like, joking about the same stuff. But all right. Yeah. I want to know about your sex life. I, you have this wild demeanor about you? And I'm just like, what is today like in bed? What? What's something that you're all about?

Unknown Speaker 50:54
Oh,

Unknown Speaker 50:55
I need I need a man that is asked. Like, that's like, Oh, you know what, you just asked me? Something like, No, you that that would be like that can tie into that I need a man that eats ass. Okay.

Unknown Speaker 51:11
So okay, let's say if we're, you know, I'm a guy, and we start dating, and we're hooking up, and the sex is good. But then you're like, you know, hey, you know, do this. And he's like, no, that's a complete deal breaker.

Unknown Speaker 51:24
I mean, like, I don't want to get like, I know, I know myself. Like, I really, I don't feel like I asked for too much. But I'm not like, I don't want you to pee on me. Like, or like something like that. Like, that's something that usually is like, more so like, I think that's a boundary. But um, I want people like, I definitely want my partner comfortable and their sexuality, but like, if I ask something that to me, I don't know if they really feel uncomfortable. Like, I wouldn't pressure them. But I'd be like, huh, yeah, well, you know, eat mash.

Unknown Speaker 51:57
I mean, you know, that's important, right? You know, you got you want life and live you want yeah, Want your partner to eat your ass and he's not down, you know, it's probably not going to work out because let's face it, you know, you You said you're in a long marriage. So, how many times you know, did you have a sexual experience? And you know, maybe if your partner was meeting your needs, it's like, okay, things are good. But year after year, if you want something physically in that person's not giving it to you, it's just I feel like it's always going to be missing. So that's why I have this podcast. It's, I try to normalize talking about our sexual preferences and, and the things that we're into and our kinks right, like it's not a big deal. It's just fucking sex. Like, you're not Yeah, you're you're loving another person. And there's not, you know, even if you do want to be peed on Hey, that's your kink? Yeah, like, exactly. That's on us. I think it's good that you know exactly what you want.

Unknown Speaker 52:49
Yeah. And like, that's the thing is like, you know, if you're someone who wants to pee on or get peed on, like, I think you deserve to find somebody that wants to pee on you, or will let up on them. But yeah, like, it's, I feel like if you guys can't meet in like, a certain area aspect of what you want, like, it's, it makes it hard. Okay, you're like, I can't go years without getting my ass eight. Like, you know,

Unknown Speaker 53:17
I felt the same way about, you know, other sexual acts. And I'm like, Okay, well, if I don't do this with my boyfriend, is he gonna go out there? And, you know, and that's not a good way of thinking, right? Because you want to like trust your partner and know that they're not with you just for for sex, right? Like, either. Yeah, it's given take in, in the you know, relationship, whether it's the the physical aspect, the emotional aspect, or the relationship responsibilities, and all that, but, okay, I'm thinking, now, you know, my boyfriend is going to shoot me but he's, I'm if I asked that guy to lick any part of my body, he would, you know, like, line up with a bell on like, he's always wonder because it's, you know, you're you're a light skinned blonde girl, but I'm half Mexican. So it's difficult to get, you know, that area. hairless? Right? And like, even Yeah, I've been like, is there okay for your butthole? Like, I told my boyfriend, he's like, No, don't do that. And I'm like, Well, I'm just like, I want you know, it's not that like, I'm shy. I'm like, I would feel more comfortable with him doing that to me. If like things were like speaking span, though, you know? Yeah, I am like, what do you what do you do? Like, do you have to get your bubble waxed? Do you know if that's something that you're doing? Are you still are you self conscious about how it looks back there?

Unknown Speaker 54:33
Um, yeah, like, because like, I've seen porn where porn stars have like, the pink is buttholes. And I'm like, my wife, my boss. was like, What do I do to get it to look like that? And and like, I never thought about, like, shaving my ass crack and like, like you said, like, I have blonde hair. But still, like, there's still hair there. So it's like, um, yeah, like so. I've never like, I don't know, I think about it now. And it's like, I mean, there was a point where I was on Amazon looking at like anal bleach. And I'm like, but it's like, but I'm like, Okay, um, Well, yeah, but I'm like, as I'm focusing is clean and shave like, I'm good.

Unknown Speaker 55:11
Yeah. Have you ever done that? The anal bleach? I, I know I haven't. I know the porn stars do it and stuff and I'm just like, Is it like normal? When you bleach your at your regular hair? Like, do you have to like, because you bleaching like the skin right? Like, I don't know, maybe I should ask the next porn star that comes on the show. But it's like, how often do you have to bleach your butthole? If that's something that

Unknown Speaker 55:33
Oh, yeah, like, I want to know. So it's not like you get to ask them when I want to know. All right, I like looked into it. And it was just like, so many mixed reviews of like, this doesn't work or this works. And like, I don't know, it was like I lightening cream, but put it on your butthole I'm like, I don't feel safe doing that.

Unknown Speaker 55:51
You know,

Unknown Speaker 55:52
I don't know. Like, there's waxy shave, there's, there's and then I don't know if there's an air for your butthole. But they should make that if that's

Unknown Speaker 56:00
larious is like I've never used Nair until like, a couple of weeks ago. And I was like, putting it on my legs. I'm like, I can't wait to put this on my asshole. And I'm like, looking at the ball. And it was I do not go on your asshole. your nipples are your vagina. And I was like, damn it. Like I was ready to put that on my butthole I was.

Unknown Speaker 56:16
I was too and like, honestly, like, I read the bottle. And then I was like, okay, like, but then I was like, put just, you know, like our personalities a

Unknown Speaker 56:24
little bit. Exactly. I

Unknown Speaker 56:25
was like, What if I just do a tester and then like, my boyfriend's like, like, he's like, I don't You're crazy. He's like, I wouldn't want my butthole to be on fire. And I'm like, okay, you're right. And so like, he talked me out of that and like, thank you.

Unknown Speaker 56:39
Yeah, you gotta have the relationship where someone's the gas and the brakes and like vice versa for I think he

Unknown Speaker 56:44
was just like, impressed at the links that I would go for his

Unknown Speaker 56:49
make sure that

Unknown Speaker 56:50
Yeah, you know what I'm like, I don't think he would trim his butthole. But who knows? You know, I've never asked him either. Okay, so I was asked this question. It's sometimes it's interesting, sometimes kind of boring. But how did you learn about sex growing up? Did you have like a parent have the birds and the bees talk? Was it like, for me, it was like, all the kids around the neighborhood were like, you know, talking about like, Oh, this is a French kid. Ooh, this is a handjob. You know what I learned? On the streets, if you will?

Unknown Speaker 57:20
Yeah, it's funny, because like, my dad was kind of a player when he was younger. And like, I remember like, I constantly walked in on my dad having sex. Oh, or like, caught Yeah, like just, it was never like his fault. It was always like mine. Like I'd wake up in the middle of the night and like, just come bussing in his room. And like, I just like was under the impression that it was two people laying in bed together naked. And I never knew that it was like things going in holes and things like that. So one of my cousin's like, I was telling her she asked me, she was like, she was a teenager like 13 or 14, and I was younger. And she's like, do you know what's sexes? And like, me being a little kid, I'm like, oh, sex, like, sex. I don't know what's sex. And she was like, telling me and I remember that. It just like traumatize me because like, the way she said it like she was a teenager, so she was being kind of a punk about it. And yeah, like, No, no, that's what my dad was doing this whole time. Oh, my God. And like, I remember it traumatized me. And then I was over it and but it was it was kind of nice. Like, I didn't have to have like a I mean, I didn't have an awkward talk. I already knew. And then like, once I knew I was like, okay, maybe I shouldn't go bussing up in my dad's room at like, one in the morning because I want water or

Unknown Speaker 58:39
maybe your dad needs to buy a lock for his door. Yeah, put a sock and and tell you not, you know, yeah, the socks here. Knock. Yeah, yeah. So okay, you know, we are these alpha females. I don't know, if you get this all the time. It's like, you know, talking about sex, like, Oh, I bet you're so dominant. And I'm like, to be honest, like I kind of, you know, we were tough all day. And I'm like, at the end of the day, with sexy time, I kind of just want to be submissive, you know, every once in a while, I want to be more dominant, but like, I really yeah, feel that role reversal in my life when it comes to like intimacy like, how are you? How do you feel like do you feel like i alpha male, alpha female all the time? Or do you kind of let your partner take over in bed?

Unknown Speaker 59:21
Um, I like to be dominated, like I want to be dominated and like told what to do and things like that. And but then I do have like, my moments where I'm like, I'm the captain now. Um, so it's kind of both but like, if you ask me like it definitely, like, I like to be told what to do. Like I want. I like someone who's very vocal and like, tells me what to do what they want how to do it, and I'm like, okay, yes. Like that's, I love that. Um, because I'm a big old baby and I just wanted like, I

Unknown Speaker 59:50
I like being told what to do. I like I like, that's where I want the Alpha Man to kick in. You know, like one of my funniest one of the funniest means I've seen is like, Don't tell me what to do. Unless we're naked together and I'm like, Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:03
Yeah, that's how I feel.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:06
So what what are what's a time in your life? Or like, What's something that makes you feel super sexy? Like maybe, you know, for me, I'll give an example. You know, I like to be, you know, submissive for the most part, but like, I tend to be extra. I feel sexy like right before my fight, right? Where here's, like, the leanest you know, not like there's like, there's a point of diminishing return right? Where we're like cutting weight. And we're just like, kind of sucked up and I'm like, I got no energy but like right before you start that weight cut and you're just in fight camp, and you just tell me in your abs are on fleek. Right. I'm like, Oh, yeah, that's what I'm like, all right. You lay down. I'm taking over.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:43
Yeah, yeah. I agree. And like and then for me, like on fight related, like when I just like have because I love makeup. Like I'm all about makeup, doing my feet in my face, hair on point. So like, when there's a day where like, my makeups just fucking phenomenal and my hair is phenomenal. I'm like, I'm ready to fuck some shit. Cuz it just makes me feel like like, it makes me feel like my little inner porn stars like unlocked and I'm like, Yes, I'm ready to fucking do all the weird shit. And like do the catfish.

Unknown Speaker 1:01:13
I suck so bad at makeup. Like I it took me like 20 years to learn how to do like, winged eyeliner and like red lips. And I'm like, Don't ask me to do anything else. Like I'm good. Like,

Unknown Speaker 1:01:22
oh my god. No, you're like, stunning.

Unknown Speaker 1:01:25
Thank you, girl. But yeah, I do have to get my makeup done sometimes for like, photoshoots and I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna take all these pictures do this photo shoot. And then I got to bring my boyfriend tonight because this is the best it ever gets.

Unknown Speaker 1:01:37
Yeah. Like that's like when I feel the sexy isn't my Oh, when I like everything is just on point. I'm like, Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker 1:01:45
So it is time for lightning sex round.

Unknown Speaker 1:01:54
Are you ready? I am always ready. All right,

Unknown Speaker 1:01:57
lightning round guys. If you don't know we do rapid fire. One question or one phrase and Tay is gonna say very fast. Yes or no? Are you ready? I'm ready. All right, my next next round. Do you dirty talk in bed? Yes, spank or like to be spanked.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:13
Be spank biting?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:15
Yes, choking.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:17
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:18
threesomes?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:21
Depends.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:22
Do you watch porn?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:24
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:24
Any foot fetish?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:26
No.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:28
bodily fluid fetish?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:29
No.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:31
Do you like bondage? Like ropes or blindfolds?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:33
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:35
Role Playing?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:36
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:37
Any but stuff on you or a partner?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:40
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:41
Do you use sex toys?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:43
Yes.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:44
Have you ever been to a sex club? No, or a swinger party? No. And are you a lingerie lover?

Unknown Speaker 1:02:51
Yes, absolutely.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:53
There's a lot of yeses.

Unknown Speaker 1:02:54
I know. I was like,

Unknown Speaker 1:02:58
I was like thinking in my head like, I'm a freak. Okay.

Unknown Speaker 1:03:02
That's all right. That's the kind of guests we want to have. All right, good job. So next up, we got Fuck, Marry, Kill.

Unknown Speaker 1:03:18
Kill one go. I think we're done. We're done here. Yeah, I'm

Unknown Speaker 1:03:21
very excited about this game for you. Sometimes I don't want to put our guests in a compromising position right where they have to play this game with somebody they might know in person. But I asked you ahead of time. I'm like, Can we do this and you're like, let's walk and do it. So I'm excited. Okay, so fuck, marry kill. We're doing the bare knuckle boxing edition. Are you ready? I'm so ready. Okay, you have to choose between these three guys who you want to fuck who you want to marry who you want to kill. We've got Tyler good john, who was actually a guest here on sex and violence Bare Knuckle boxer. Brandon Lambert also Bare Knuckle boxer. And finally we got Chris liebing former UFC fighter also Bare Knuckle boxer now.

Unknown Speaker 1:04:02
Who you want

Unknown Speaker 1:04:03
to fuck? Who you want to marry who you want to kill?

Unknown Speaker 1:04:06
Oh my gosh. Okay, um, I want to kill Tyler. Good, john. No, that's no I'm so sorry. JOHN, you got to go. I'm just and I would. I would fuck Brandon lammer and I would kill No, I mean, I would marry Chris leven because Chris leaving just seems like such a good wholesome man. Like I would marry him. It's like Brandon Lambert. He's like got that bad boy. Everybody hates him. thing going for him and I came in Tyler good john. Like, I met Brandon Lambert and person has been nothing but super super nice to me. So sweet. So kind. So yeah,

Unknown Speaker 1:04:41
nice. Okay, what's the beef with Tyler? Good john and Brandon Lambert. I mean, if we're gossiping,

Unknown Speaker 1:04:46
you know, I um, I don't really know. I think it just was like online Instagram bullshit. And Brandon Lambert is just very focal. And it's kind of like that Conor McGregor. factor to me. He is like how I see it like he, you know, he's talking his shit and it gets him noticed and people are talking about him and buzzing about him. But like, he like he, he's a good fighter. He believes in himself. And he's got all of that going for him. He's got everything going for him. So fuck it, like, why not? Like, I'm not that kind of fighter. I can't talk shit because I'm just like such a lover. But, um, but him like, he's got that factor of like that. And I think it's just like, it's funny because like, I've met him in person. And I know like, how nice and how sweet he is. And to see people online like that don't even know him better, like, Fuck you. But it was really nice, I promise.

Unknown Speaker 1:05:40
But you and I both know that we're in a sport. That's this weird mixture of real athleticism, but also entertainment. Right? Like, yeah, a little WWE ish sometimes. Right. But like, yeah, you know, we're actually getting into a fight. And you know, it's not scripted. And we don't know the outcome. Right? So yeah, and it's just it's weird because that trash talk sells and I'm with you. I'm exactly the same way. It's like, Alright, that works for some people, but that's not my thing. Plus, yeah, you better back up your trash talk. Otherwise, you

Unknown Speaker 1:06:08
look like an idiot. Yeah, but it's like one of those things like, like you said, so WWE is that like, sometimes you don't know if it's real or fake? And sometimes it is fucking real. And sometimes you're like, Oh, I really thought you guys hate each other. But it was like, not real. So that's the hard thing. But I really do believe that Tyler and Brandon hate each other like with a with a passion.

Unknown Speaker 1:06:31
We will have Tyler back on or maybe we'll have the Brandon Brandon guy Brandon Lambert,

Unknown Speaker 1:06:35
and I like I love Tyler. Good john, but I'm sorry. I have to kill you. Go Tyler. Alright,

Unknown Speaker 1:06:41
so now we have fan questions. Very excited about this next one. Okay, I'm ready as she fights to wants to know it's a two part question a Would you rather have a one night stand with Brian Ortega from the UFC. In the White House.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:04
Or surrender?

Unknown Speaker 1:07:06
Brian Ortega in the White House or a threesome with Rachel ostrich and valley lreda in a one star motel.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:14
Oh, God Larry's gonna say Brian. Brian Ortega in the White House. But like Rachel also it's kind of hard to resist like, but Brian Ortega in the White House.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:24
Why not? and Valerie lreda to like she's Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 1:07:27
like she's Yeah. Like, how

Unknown Speaker 1:07:30
can you get

Unknown Speaker 1:07:31
I'm like, I like her.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:32
I like her training. And I'm like, What the fuck? I literally look like Gollum, like when I'm done training. And then I see her She looks like a freakin million dollar.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:43
I'm the same way. I'm like, yeah. And I like it's funny because I'm not old. But like, you know, she's in her early 20s. And I'm just like, a young girl thing. I'm like, too old for that shit.

Unknown Speaker 1:07:53
Yeah. They're both perfect. They're both perfect. But definitely I would take Ryan Ortega in the White House. Okay, first of all, I don't know if it's Brian or Tigger the white house because I've never been in the White House.

Unknown Speaker 1:08:07
The part before the same person as she fights to which is a great page to follow guys. They basically just showcase all female fighters and whether it's, you know, Bare Knuckle boxing or MMA, or even WWE and karate sometimes it's pretty cool. Yeah, Part B, so spend three years in prison. Or never win another fight ever again.

Unknown Speaker 1:08:30
Oh, gosh, I'm going to prison. At least I could like, probably get some flies in there and like to still train, you know, like, I could be prepared when I get out. I feel like you know, that might be some kind of intense fight camp. So I'd go to prison and then come out like a fuckin I don't even know.

Unknown Speaker 1:08:46
Yeah. Okay, um, let's see. This is kind of interesting one at rolling w master guns. Have you ever dated a guy who enjoyed pain?

Unknown Speaker 1:08:59
Um, yeah. I suppose like, I've never had anybody, like, tell me to like, beat the shit out of them or like, twist their nipples or stomp their balls or anything like

Unknown Speaker 1:09:09
that.

Unknown Speaker 1:09:12
But I feel like they've been with free except, like, you know, like a norm. Like, I don't even wanna say normal. It's not the word. But like, the rough stuff, but I've never been with someone that's like really genuinely been like, stomp out my balls and like, I would love that. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 1:09:26
that's, that's another level.

Unknown Speaker 1:09:28
Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 1:09:29
Okay, let's see. We got at Liam underscore,

Unknown Speaker 1:09:33
M,

Unknown Speaker 1:09:34
underscore I, what's it like to be a single mother and a fighter when you have to commit a lot of time to fight camps.

Unknown Speaker 1:09:42
It's really hard. But I always I follow a schedule. Like I make sure I follow my schedule and make sure that all my time is getting put where it needs to be which my children come first and foremost at all times. But I also communicate with them like hey, Mommy, do you mean like if like when I leave for fights like cuz they're so young right now I want them to be able to decide to go to fight so I communicate with them and let them know and like if I'm going on a fight trip, I really just tell them like where I'm going what's going on I even though they're three and five, I constantly communicate with them, but shit like I have mental breakdowns all the fucking time because I'm like, I don't even know how I'm like doing this. Oh, but, but I've always said like, Where there's a will there's a way and I just make it work. I could not give you the recipe. Exactly. It's just like, I know what I want. And I'm gonna make it happen and make it happen to the best of my ability. So that's, it's a struggle, though. It is definitely a struggle.

Unknown Speaker 1:10:39
You said it yourself. You're like, I don't even know how I'm doing it. But But you but you're doing it. And that's, you know, that's the thing, right? Is that? Yeah, people always ask me, they're like, what advice would you give to future fighters or this and I'm like, it doesn't matter if it's a boy, or if it's a girl, if you're just starting fighting, or if you've been doing it for a few years, I always say the same thing. The difference between me and maybe like, you know, a dozen other fighters who didn't make it was that I always found a way to keep going, right? So I've never had kids, but like, I've had money problems, relationship problems, family issues, you know, like health issues, injuries, you know, whatever it is, it's gonna happen. And you have to have a way to overcome it. You know, and that's sometimes easier for other people, you know, maybe they have some financial support. Sometimes other people don't, you know, like I said, I can't fucking imagine what it's like to have two young boys, you know, you're supermom, and I look up to you in that regard. I'm like, wow, like, That's amazing.

Unknown Speaker 1:11:29
Thank you. Yeah, whatever just keeps. It's just like one of those things. Like, I tell people this all the time. Like, everything looks fucking great on social media. Like that's the thing about social media is like nobody posts like, I mean, some people do, but like, you don't really get to see the bad side. And I'm like, you guys have no idea like it is like, some days I wake up and I feel like I'm scraping myself out of bed and like trying to just like glue the pieces together. Like more times and like me just waking up and feeling good and ready to go. Yeah, um, so yeah, it's definitely rough. But like we said, like, when you have something like your mindset to something goals and things you want to do you make it happen. And that's just all there is to it. You're doing the damn thing today. And oh, thank you.

Unknown Speaker 1:12:12
So so happy to have you on the show. I think you're a great fuckin role model for for anyone you know, male or female. You know, you went through a divorce you said fuck it, you made your debut. You know, you got this performance of the night. You're training for your next fight. By the way, you know, before we go, who do you want to fight next?

Unknown Speaker 1:12:31
I want to fight whoever they put me with. Like, see, this is where like this shit talking about like, actually, um, I would love to fight Jeannie savage again, because I fought her in MMA. She's one of those people that is the bad guy. And she can go she constantly is like, or was constantly posting about me on social media. I just ignore that shit. Like, I don't I don't have time to argue with people on Instagram. I like you guys know my schedule. You kind of know my schedule. Yeah, it's like for me to sit and take the time to like, argue on Instagram. I'm not gonna do it. But I would like to fight her again, just because like, I fought her. I broke my nose. It was a loss. And like, it was just like, it's one of those things that like, I want to avenge when the time is right. But I have all the respect in the world. Virginie Savage, but also at the same time, like I kind of want to get gangster rigidity. But Kathy Rob was to actually talking about coming to bare knuckle. And if she comes I would love to do that. I actually really really like Cassie. Rob. I think it would be a great matchup. She's tough as nails. But basically like my thing is just like whatever they tell me to do. I'll do and like I don't really want to be like, fuck this bitch and fuck that. But like I just I don't I can't get my heart You don't have Yeah, I

Unknown Speaker 1:13:45
also think that there's a way to to promote yourself and boost yourself up in a classy way and instead of using like a trash talk and kind of like, you know, disrespectful way, you know, you can just fucking Yeah, just you know, no, I got my fucking better than this bitch. You know, like, we're both out here trying to make our money. But at the end of the day, I'm just better than her. It's just all about how you get stuff out there. Right? But like, we're not

Unknown Speaker 1:14:06
in there baking cookies together, obviously, but also the same time. It's like, you're working for something, I'm working for something we're gonna have to get in there. Like whatever they tell us to do is what's going to have to happen so like we're going to fight and then it's going to be over and then we're going to be on to the next thing so like what's the point of me wasting my energy and being like, I hate you like I don't know you? Yeah, I don't personally know you so like, but people get personal like I definitely have some gangster in me so

Unknown Speaker 1:14:32
yeah, and you know, just as well as I do that if you if you don't respect a fighter inside of the cage and you let your guard down for some whatever reason, you know, you're gonna get fucked up. So maybe that's why I don't trash talks. trash talk while trash talk.

Unknown Speaker 1:14:47
Freudian slip.

Unknown Speaker 1:14:48
You know Yeah, that's why I don't trash talk is because I'm like, you know what? deep down I know this girl is working just as hard as I am for the exact

Unknown Speaker 1:14:55
Exactly. But Exactly.

Unknown Speaker 1:14:57
Alright. Hey, what Where can we where can we find you on all this? social medias twitter instagram snapchat only fans.

Unknown Speaker 1:15:04
Only fans My only fans is only fans calm slash Tate killaby my Instagram is at Jay W. Starling. And I've got Facebook Taylor Starling. I haven't met my friend limit on there yet. So if anybody wants to add me on Facebook, that's fine. Um, I don't do Twitter. I like I did when I was like younger when Twitter first was like really? poppin Yeah, but for like, I just haven't like, I know I should probably make one but the energy of doing that and like trying to build followers, I'm like, you guys just follow me on Instagram. Now there's, um, right. Yeah, there's Tick Tock. I haven't Tick Tock. I don't even know my name on Tick tock, because it kind of like generated like a thing. Um, but yeah, Instagram, Facebook. Follow me add me. And thank you so much for having me on here. And I'm so thankful. Thank you today. We're

Unknown Speaker 1:15:52
gonna keep watching you. And yeah, maybe we'll have you on again in the future.

Unknown Speaker 1:15:57
Absolutely. Thank you so much. Ashlee. I appreciate your time.

Unknown Speaker 1:16:00
All right, talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.

Unknown Speaker 1:17:05
Okay, guys,

Unknown Speaker 1:17:06
that was a very, very fun episode where we talked about lots of lots of things that normally don't get talked about. So thank you, Tay, that was very fun. And I think she just has the right game plan in general. You know, she's, she recognizes that, you're never gonna make everybody happy. But you know, she's just gonna focus on herself and do what makes her happy. She said something that really resonates. It's, you know, no one's gonna pay your bills. But you Right, so the end of the day, you got to do what you got to do. And, you know, I think it's great that she's that open with what she wants in the bedroom and in life. And it's hard to say those kinds of things right, now, talk about our kinks, talk about what we want. And, you know, six, it's a very vulnerable act. But, you know, we've got to be brave enough to do what makes us happy, even if it does make us a little uncomfortable at times. Maybe that's having a conversation about the kinks with your partner, or maybe that's just realizing that the partner that you're with maybe isn't for you, but whatever it is speaking up, in my opinion, will always be worth it. And that's why we have these talks here on sex and violence with rebel girl. So guys, that's it. I hope you enjoyed another show. We'll see you next week. And remember, be kind be grateful, but don't take shit from anyone. Special. Thank you for tuning in. And for all your fan questions. Hope you guys enjoyed this episode. Thank you to audio engineer DJ zl DJs Oh, tomorrow kid studio, which is not where we're at. We are at Black Belt collective. in Huntington Beach, at Black Belt Krav Maga, producer Nate Jackson at nature Domus and sound tech at its Goodman. Thank you, Tony. You can also find us on Instagram at sex and violence rebel girl and myself at Ashley Amai. And lastly,

Unknown Speaker 1:18:51
please guys,

Unknown Speaker 1:18:51
if you like this podcast, do us a favor, go rate and review us on Apple or Spotify, or wherever else you listen. This podcast will always be free. But the more reviews we get the more we go up in the charts, which means we can crank out more episodes for you guys. So subscribe to this podcast and tune in next week to hear more tales of sex and violence.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

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