Episode 17: Valerie Loureda
Unknown Speaker 0:04
Unknown Speaker 0:18
Hey guys, welcome back to sex and violence with
Unknown Speaker 0:20
rebel girl where we interviewed top level MMA fighters and other guests about love, dating, romance, and
Unknown Speaker 0:28
sex. I'm your host, Ashley rebel girl, Evan Smith. Now let's talk about sex.
Unknown Speaker 0:43
What's happening the hot stuff? Okay, here we go again. So, you've tuned into the podcast that you might not want to listen to around the kids, grandparents or pretty much anyone else not ready for the real deal. Some people will hear the title alone and be scared away, but not you though. Here you are being naughty, diving deeper into the lives of some of your favorite people and not giving a crap what other things good for you. If you're tuning in for the first time, it's a different kind of podcast. It's a new spin on MMA journalism more risque, more personal and actually more about the fighter than what they do inside the cage or guest we've been getting into the lives of other people this past 2020 and leaving our own reality for a bit since like I keep saying on the podcast 2020 is pretty much a shitstorm the good news for me is I got a fight so I feel like I've purpose again in my life. It's a few months away so I've got plenty of time to train training is going great. The date location and opponent are November 28 against normal Dumont actually bantamweight. So if you guys don't know I used to fight flyway for the last two years and then I fought back and wait before that and actually A lot of people know this I thought at 145 I was a big old girl. still am. And I just you know, flipped around weight classes periodically got skinnier, I guess. But now I'm back up to bantamweight, quarantine and all that just, you know, I'd rather commit to something that I know I'm for sure gonna make the weight instead of not know what kind of gyms or facilities are going to be open due to COVID and then show up and not make weight because to me now making weight is extremely unprofessional and disrespectful to my opponent. And even though I want to punch my opponent in the face and beat them up, I do respect them enough to make the weight and you know, put on a good fight. So stay tuned for that guys. I'm just gonna, periodically every week tell you about training and all that some new stuff is happening for me. I am trying out a couple of new gyms which is hard, you know, because when you leave a gym, it's kind of like a breakup and breakups suck right but like I talked to a lot of people and they say You know, with breakups, it's like, oh, you're never gonna find someone that great and then boom, you find another person. And so I know that just because I had a breakup with one of my gyms doesn't mean I'm not going to find a new great gym. So I'll keep you guys tuned in on that. Also, I found out this couple days ago that Rachel asta Vich and genoma Zani who we had on the show are gonna fight each other on the same card. So that's going to be crazy. November 28. I believe it's going to be in Vegas, but who knows, we might actually head back to Abu Dhabi fight Island. Things The world is so weird, right? But yeah, I just really want to tell you about that stuff. And then we have an amazing guest. I can't wait to tell you guys, you know, talk to you about her. She's really young. But you know what? Let's just get to the guest. Today's guest is a Bella Torre flyweight, she's only 22 years old, but what she lacks an age she makes up for an enthusiasm, passion and excitement. A Miami native with Cuban heritage. She has model dancer to her already impressive resume. This young warrior has an undefeated pro record of three in Oh, and has no signs of slowing down anytime soon. With a combination of beauty and beastliness, she's out to break records and stereotypes. We're lucky enough to be led in as she talks about fighting straight out of the womb, pre-fight dance rituals, the benefits of dating alpha males, outgrowing fuckboys, and so much more. Here's your guest, Valerie Loretta.
Unknown Speaker 4:52
Okay, we're here with Valerie. Hey, Val, how are you doing?
Unknown Speaker 4:56
Hey, thank you for having me today. I'm super excited about this. Nope. problem.
Unknown Speaker 5:01
So I just want to get started right off the bat and talk about your amazing, you know, new and undefeated MMA career. I know you have a background in Taekwondo, but, you know, can you just give us a brief synopsis of how you got into MMA?
Unknown Speaker 5:18
Yeah, so um, my dad had a Taekwondo school for 34 years in Miami, you know, and me and my sisters were born into this sport. There's no other option then to be a martial artist that's completely obsessed with Taekwondo, and it was a family business. So we got into that then my mom loves beauty and, and magazines and glamour and all of that. And she had me as a ballerina, as an ice skater as a dancer I made. I did art, I did everything. And I was a martial artist, you know. So eventually, I just realized that martial arts was my passion and I stayed in that path and my dream My whole life was to go to the Olympics, right. That was my goal. And that was my dad's dream. And I did compete. Olympic style Taekwondo for many years, I went to a world championship I went to an Olympic qualifier, I lost an Olympic qualifier against a Canadian girl. And, you know, I was always a good Tacoma fighter in a very different way. Not like most Taekwondo athletes, you know, I didn't have that body type of the tall, long legs and I just felt like something was missing. My dad didn't just raised us. As Tacoma fighters, he raised us as well grounded martial artists, you know, we will do our self defense, we'll do grappling on the floor and stuff. And I just always want to know something was missing. So I wouldn't win as much as I thought I deserved to because I was always training so hard. And then just things fall off with one of my coaches. My dad had working for school, and one of his students was doing jujitsu on the side and the dad was like, Oh, you know, we should watch your own miles fight this weekend. And Santi was a little kid. He goes, Oh, he, he does jujitsu at this place. And that was the first time I watched MMA on TV and the first Time I Saw it I'll never forget I got chills down my body. My sister said, 90, I could do that. Nothing. I could be known for being a few more martial artists with this platform. And then next day I was in the jujitsu class, and that's where it all began. That's awesome. So what what year was that? When you saw that MMA fight? I was, I believe at the end of 2017.
Unknown Speaker 7:23
Man, I'm so excited for you. Your career is just like just starting, but it's, it's starting with a bang, you know, I mean, regardless of 2020 being kind of a wacky, weird year to get through, I think you're, you know, obviously you're undefeated. But your the media attention that you're getting is awesome as well, because, as you know, unfortunately, it matters how you fight, but it's also it's a marketing thing, you know, so the more marketable you are, it's like, you know, more followers and sponsorships and it's all connected, right? So, you have this look, everybody's talking about about it but you're not just looks you back it up with your skills and you know everything that you just told me your years and years of hard work, so I think it's great and you're only 22 year old 22 right? Yes.
Unknown Speaker 8:14
When's your birthday?
Unknown Speaker 8:16
July 19. And they are now yours is July 9.
Unknown Speaker 8:18
Oh my gosh, you just turned 22 Yeah, but cancer. Oh my
Unknown Speaker 8:23
God, my cancer.
Unknown Speaker 8:27
That's awesome. Except for I'm like a decade older than you
Unknown Speaker 8:31
know, okay. Yeah, I remember when I was three, and oh, that's when I actually got into the UFC. And I remember thinking like, Oh my god, I'm not ready. I was like, 23 or 24. I forget but you know, I remember my coach telling me, you know, you don't say no when the UFC calls. So do you feel kind of similar in the sense that you're under the big lights, but you only have you know, like three fights. You know, do you feel like you're I mean, clearly you're ready because you're knocking knocking pitches out, right? But how do you feel about that only having, you know, three fights and you're getting all this attention and you're on one of the largest platforms, you know, one of the largest organizations in the world.
Unknown Speaker 9:15
Yeah, you know, I'm a little crazy, right? So, as an engineer, I was like, dying to go pro after my first fight. The thing is, you have to understand that I've been fighting literally my whole life, like my mom was pregnant with me during her black belt test, like rested martial arts. So although it's a completely different sport, and like five other martial arts and Taekwondo, I just feel like I've been doing this for so many years. So as an amateur, I was like, they thought I was crazy. I was like, I want to go pro. I want to fight already. I want to fight pro already. And then like valor, you haven't even thought to amateur fights, right? So I I just have had an intuition in my heart constantly telling me what's right or what's wrong. You know, after my last amateur fight, I just knew that was going to be the last amateur fight I had. And coincidentally, you know, I got these offers from different promotions. And I saw my face with the billeter logo and like something feels right, you know, this is my path. And this is where I'm going to stay. And that's what I did, but even crazier. Okay. I was I, my debut as a professional fighter without shin guards. Okay. And in MMA was opening on Main card as my first fight in the Mohegan Sun in Connecticut, and no one told me I was gonna open that card. They just kind of throw me in there. I was like, holy shit, what's going on? Like, I just remember seeing that. What did you get yourself into Valerie? I always felt in the worst positions, you know, and of course you have to overcome it. Yeah. I don't know. It just felt natural to me. It felt good for me and it's a lot pressure but I've been doing this my whole life I feel like I have so much experience in handling pressure and performing under the light so I
Unknown Speaker 11:09
don't mean that
Unknown Speaker 11:10
but that's great. I mean I feel like I feel a little similar in the sense that I've been given a lot of high risk high reward opportunities in my life and that's what this sport is right high risk high reward you gotta you know, you can walk the walk you can talk the talk but you got to walk the walk and you know, high highs and low lows and you're on a you know, a winning streak right now and I hope you never feel a low in your whole career, you know, but you've already felt lows very low very low. We're not like obviously like Victory Slash loss but what do you mean?
Unknown Speaker 11:44
No, because after my second fight with Bella toward like, my family, this has been our family business and whole life. My family just split my parents went through a huge divorce after my, my second fight. Yeah, and then I think the reality show that Last year, I fell two times and then I did a reality show. And during all of that my parents are going through divorce, I was thrown into the show that was extremely out of my comfort zone and I just went through a lot and I struggled through with a huge eating disorder too. So it took me a lot to get back to where I am right now and perform like that. Despite
Unknown Speaker 12:18
Wow, I didn't I definitely didn't know that. That's crazy. I mean, I don't want to you know, dig too deep if it's too personal, but what type of you know eating disorder and how did you overcome that?
Unknown Speaker 12:29
I just the thing is that I have been cutting weight since I was 10 years old, you know? Thanks since I was little for us opens I will try to make 94 pounds then nine for me. I'm a thick girl My life has been based around my weight, you know, in a combat sport, my weight so I've never been able to go to a school party and like have a cookie without hiding it from my parents, if that makes sense. Yeah, so food and my brain has always been wrong. And then that way like, after like when I'm not cutting wait for a fight after I will just binge like crazy, like I wouldn't be hungry, it's just that anxiety I'm an emotional eater then xiety would just make that happen to me and I got to the point I didn't know if I could get out of it and I just had to replace bad habits with good friendships and just I I stopped living alone, I lived with my mom for two months, you know, my sister came and they had me in like boot camp and, and my family helped me overcome it. That's awesome. So you basically found a way to change those negative behaviors into positive ones maybe you know, worked out more or you hung out with your family or talk talked it out or something like that. That's awesome.
Unknown Speaker 13:48
That's awesome. And it's crazy to hear that because you're in the budding stages of your career and no one would know that you're having problems because you're doing so great. You know, like, you're you're winning, but honestly You know, and you're just this bubbly personality when I came across your page in your profile and your you know your highlights, I'm like, wow, this girl exudes happiness. You know, you're like one of those kind of people and I feel like if I met you in person, you know, you're you you're one of those kind of people that you just, you're happily happy and bubbly and you kind of have like an infectious personality. Has anyone ever told you that?
Unknown Speaker 14:23
Yeah, um, yeah, people tell me that I have very happy bubbly personality, but I don't know I've just I've struggled to do so many things in my life. You know, my mom had leukemia at one point, which is another reason I gave up my big dream. So like I've been at the low even though it's not in the main like to follow the Olympics is my dream My whole life and I never thought to achieve that. And like that's always on the back of my mind, but I just think about everyday how all the times I spend on a mat crying and and sweating since I was a baby like never getting to enjoy the same experience as other girls. You know, I said over my dead body Why? do something with it, you know? Yeah. And I'm using that in my, in my MMA career, it can go, it can go without me becoming someone because my upbringing was just so tough and just so different than any other woman.
Unknown Speaker 15:13
Yeah, no, that's
Unknown Speaker 15:14
I definitely relate with the I never had an eating disorder but I've been cutting weight since I was 15 I wrestled on a boys team and I wrestled in college and and, you know, I was like, you know, chunky little girl. So it's just it's always been about my weight and the number and you know, thank goodness that we get older and we learn the correct ways, you know, nutrition habits and how to cut weight and all that and yeah, I'm really happy you said that because I know there's a lot of young women that are looking up to you right now. And, you know, an eating and eating disorder can can kill you can ruin your life
Unknown Speaker 15:47
can ruin your career. It's mentally very challenging, you know, because it messes with your emotions because if you're heavier, not happy like me personally like the heavier I am the less happy and bubbly. I am the closer I get to my weight, like for a fight is when I'm the happiness so I kind of mix one thing with another but make sense. Like, I'm only happy and I'm only like, on my highest like when I'm training for a fight, if that makes sense and an option like my fights, I'm just depressed because I'm out of my routine I'm out of doing what I love and have nothing to look forward to, you know, yeah,
Unknown Speaker 16:21
everyone right now can relate to that's what 2020 has been all about. Everybody is out of their routine and you know, depression, anxiety, even unfortunately, suicide rates have skyrocketed because of that. So everyone's with you in that in that sense, you know, but speaking of fights, do you have one lined up? Are you waiting for that phone call?
Unknown Speaker 16:39
Yeah, I'm um, I'm planning to fight a early December, end of November, early December. That's my goal. You know, bellator gives me the opportunity. I'm gonna take it and try to do two fights during this quarantine and, and just reclaim everything I've worked for. That's awesome. Do you have anyone in mind that you want to fight anyone you want to yourself against. Um, no, they, they they are. They call me with who they feel is right for me and, and I know every fight I have gets harder and harder, but you know, I'm ready for it. I'm looking forward to it. For sure the struggle has just begun.
Unknown Speaker 17:15
No, but but i think you know, you're close. You're like, you're like us crazy female fighters we thrive off the struggle. We see it as a challenge and we step up every time so I know you're gonna kill it. And you know, whoever you fight, you know, you're an exciting fighter to watch it. There's nobody that like rubs you the wrong way that you're like, ooh, I kind of want to fight her.
Unknown Speaker 17:37
No, unlike so outside of fighting and the least confrontational person in the world. I like I cannot talk to like I'm just super on compensation. I've never gone into a fight outside of my sport. It's really weird. And I just go only thing I take personally, is when they start talking shit about the way that I market myself. Because I don't do anything for marketing. This isn't the way I am. Like I've been a ballerina and like a normal girl at the same time as a martial artist from when I was 15 years old. I was fighting Taekwondo competitions and doing little photoshoots with my sister before I love like I enjoy and to team and enjoy production. I enjoy photoshoots I that's like my passion outside of the cage and why can I Showboat? You know, it's not for men? It's for myself.
Unknown Speaker 18:28
Yeah, I love it. I think I you know, I read somewhere that you are interested in changing the, you know, the way that women fighters are perceived, you know, we don't all have to have short haircuts and, you know, dress masculine and you know, have deep voices. It's okay to be feminine. And I love that about you because you're not faking it. Like you said, You've been doing it since you were a kid, and you're gonna keep on doing it no matter what anyone says. Rock you brought up, you know, people talking down on you for that. And I didn't know that actually the UFC is made See chess on I'm not sure
Unknown Speaker 19:01
all saying hi.
Unknown Speaker 19:03
So for those of you listening who don't who don't know what happened, the UFC is Macy chess on blue. She's a 3545. Or actually, she basically said that she that Valerie. She was claiming that she was selling sex and not MMA. And I read that and I was like, Man, that's unfortunate because the people that should be supporting each other are us female fighters. Yeah. And so, you know, I don't want to break any Actually, I'll tell you something that happened to me the other day, and I'm like, wow, I'm really growing as an adult. And this girl named Beck Rawlings in the UFC didn't like her. She rubbed me the wrong way. And I even said some stuff in an interview a couple years ago, when we fought I was like, Yeah, I think she's raunchy. And I think that she's overly sexualized herself and blah, blah, blah, right. Well, I wrote back a couple months ago, and I was like, Hey, you know, I just got to get this off my chest. I think that it was wrong of me to say that to you and to say that, you know, you're marketing yourself the wrong way. No one should be quitting. Besides how they choose to market themselves, and here I am with a sex slash dating podcast, and someone will say the same thing about me, right? So I just couldn't live with being a hypocrite because you should be able to express yourself however you want. And I think it's great that you're doing what you love, you know, like, so anyway, but I just I heard that and it's funny that you said, You've never been in a real fight, except for when somebody talks shit. And I'm like, shit.
Unknown Speaker 20:28
Like, I hold it in and I don't respond, and I don't respond, but it's like a buildup and I'm a very aggressive person. And like, I don't know, I'm very like petty so that all of that just like, it makes me crazier. And that makes me crazier. And then whoever in front of me, I just take it out on that in a moment. I think about all those things, but I don't know. It's hard to deal with the social media sometimes, but I don't care. I really don't pay attention to it.
Unknown Speaker 20:54
Yeah, you know, that's one question I got to ask you because you're 22 and I and I'm gonna keep Bring it up because I'm just blown away at how mature you seem at a young age because I'm 33 almost at 3233 I just turned 33. And, you know, I would love to say I've got this super thick skin, I don't care what people say, but like, I'll be scrolling I'll read some comments and I'm just like, ah, hurts bee stings you know. And my question to you is how are you able to deal with those those negative comments those people's you know, baby basically saying that, you know, all those other stupid negative thing we don't use to talk about it, you know, but I want to know what you would tell people dealing with the same thing you are because there's tons of girls guys out there that are getting bullied or harassed online and how do you stay so positive?
Unknown Speaker 21:44
Honestly, I do not and have never cared about anyone's opinion on me. I when I went to high school, you know, I was that girl that showed up every day with a gallon and the tuna and my girls would bully me because I was cut And I was eating tuna on the table and they said it smelled bad. They didn't want to sit next to me. I just had, I just never cared I've never cared anyone's opinion on me. Because I've always known my purpose. I've always reminded myself of my value. And of course, not just myself that Valerie, you have a bigger purpose, one day, you're gonna be someone, and they're all gonna want to copy you. I'm just like that my whole life. I've always felt that everyone has always criticized me, but then they're copying me. And I know I'm doing something right and that aspect. So the way I deal with social media is I do not care. I'm the most confident person and myself my purpose on this world. And if they're telling me it's because I'm arguing, I, I do not care. I know what I'm doing. It's for myself. Something I'm doing is working and I'm going to stick to it. And it doesn't matter what anyone says about me unless it's my family. If it's my family, and they're telling me something that's when I pay attention. If it's people that truly care about me, I'm like, Oh, wait, hold on. That's great that you say that I always say something similar. It's the only people's opinion that should matter are your inner circle, you know, you know, there's people in your inner circle and then right outside that inner circle their acquaintances, you know who maybe they think that they know you, but they don't really know you, you know? And the only people that I think
Unknown Speaker 23:16
that should matter are those immediate family, friends, you know, the friends that you consider family, like I do I consider
Unknown Speaker 23:22
that the purpose you
Unknown Speaker 23:24
know, yeah, that's such great advice, girl, you know, so because, you know, you're, you're killing it in life, and there's so many people, young people, old people, me who I'm like, dude, like, I need to take a chapter out of your book and just remind myself of my purpose because words hurt, you know, I don't care if they're on a frickin page or if someone says them, you know, but, uh, but yeah, I think we just need to remind ourselves that what we're doing as far ourselves and fuck everybody else. So we'll give ourselves you know, I agree. totally gonna get personal now. Ready? Go. Okay. So beautiful. Oh by the way you are I looked it up you are Cuban descent given background yet. Okay, so
Unknown Speaker 24:07
even American grandpa's Peruvian.
Unknown Speaker 24:11
Spicy. Yeah, I like it. So beautiful girl I know everyone wants to know How do you identify? Are you straight gay? pansexual bisexual. Non. I'm straight, straight. Got it. And are you dating anyone? Are you single?
Unknown Speaker 24:27
No, I'm single.
Unknown Speaker 24:29
Oh, everyone in podcast land is cheering right now. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 24:35
So it's so funny cuz when I put your picture up, like the amount of guys that were like, ask her she'll date me. Does she date normal guys? What about me? I'm like, yeah, guys, I'm just doing this podcast so I can give you a shot at Val.
Unknown Speaker 24:49
Q. I love
Unknown Speaker 24:52
all the little comments like they make me happy.
Unknown Speaker 24:55
Yeah, yeah, it's definitely like an ego boost. That's one thing about social media and You I'm sure you know this as well. The comments that people send you aren't always negative, you know, I'm sure you get ones that are, like inspiring, like, hey, Val, you know, you inspired me to do mixed martial arts or to dance or to be myself and those are the ones that I'm like, my little heart like melts. I'm like, Okay, I'm doing the right thing.
Unknown Speaker 25:19
Answer I answer like, sometimes I go to my my sister also helps me on my social media. And sometimes I go through my requested DNS, and it impacts me more when I see girls that are like, Hey Valerie, like I'm really struggling. I'm in the male's wrestling team and I don't know how to deal with their ego and stuff. I'm like, Oh girl, I'm allowed to tell you about how to deal with a man because that's the biggest thing in this sport. Like we're in the male dominated she like the Eagles gotta go.
Unknown Speaker 25:48
So you're cool like that. If a girl's like gonna write you a message you'll respond to her.
Unknown Speaker 25:53
Hell yeah, that's that's my purpose on this world.
Unknown Speaker 25:58
That's awesome. Yeah, to do you And kind of blade, you know, lead the way. I mean, there's women before us that are obviously, you know, they really, you know, chop down the chapter path for us, you know, but I think it's we have a long way to go to be considered, you know, equal and on the same level as the men in my opinion,
Unknown Speaker 26:17
especially in martial arts
Unknown Speaker 26:18
for sure at So, are you single and ready to mingle? Are you just kind of like focusing on your career? What's going on with that? Okay.
Unknown Speaker 26:34
So actually, I had a boyfriend. I was in a relationship when I was 18. And, you know, he really helped me become who I am today. And he, he was like, I owe him a lot of my success right now, and we're not together anymore. But um, he was just that, like, when I ended Taekwondo. He was that guy that he put on the chest protector for me outside in the sun so I could kick in And train on my own and stuff because I had problems with my, with my dad after I stopped took Well, no and he was just so supportive, like I've never met anyone as supportive as that guy and stuff and things didn't work out. But I was in a relationship for a very long time. And I always say thank you, you know, I won this fight, I said, Thank you, thank you, like, I owe you so much for the way you helped me and supported me and I know it didn't work out. You know, I thought a little crazy, but I always am grateful for people who were there for me unconditionally, and he was one of those people. So I was in a relationship for a while and, and now this fight I proved to myself that I don't need anyone. You know, I Allah, Allah had there in Connecticut was me, my sister, my two corners, and that's it. That's all I have to do what I love and I'm just happy being alone right now and completely focusing on my career and loving myself and growing it not having anyone around me with jealousy or trying to take everything I've worked life so I'm alone and understand somebody incredible or the man I'm gonna marry. I'm single right now.
Unknown Speaker 28:09
That's great. Can I ask how long you were in that relationship for from 18 till
Unknown Speaker 28:15
I was 18 to lows like at the end of 20 2021 and whose origin? I was 18 of those 23 Really? Be a woman.
Unknown Speaker 28:26
Yeah, that's I'm so happy that you have like actually good feelings after you know when you're first and probably biggest relationships right? longest relationships.
Unknown Speaker 28:38
Yeah, I have good feelings, but he doesn't
Unknown Speaker 28:41
know. Okay, nevermind. I thought it was I thought it was
Unknown Speaker 28:48
a little hard. That's why I know but I feel bad. No, no, it's part of dating. You know, especially at your age. There's you have a you know, maybe You may meet the man of your dreams tomorrow, but most likely it's gonna be kissing a couple more frogs until you find your prince. That's just the name of the game, right?
Unknown Speaker 29:09
I don't even want to kiss frogs girl, I'm scared of everybody.
Unknown Speaker 29:13
myself my life.
Unknown Speaker 29:15
No, you know what, that's now's the time to focus because men will will always be there. But if you were kind of like, you know, and I like that you said, Unless he's amazing. And you know, maybe it's gonna be like the, you know, your husband or whatever. So you kind of you're not, the doors might close, you know, you're just very focused right now and you're not looking you're not like, oh,
Unknown Speaker 29:34
let's go out and meet a guy ever in my life, you know, and you don't have a saying, and I feel like, I sacrificed love for glory. And later on in my life, I want to write a book about that, but I just feel like I sacrifice my love life or loyalty is I'm so focused on myself. My career. I can't really be a wife and girlfriend. I know that makes sense. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 29:56
You know, preaching to the choir woman. You know that While a lot of people tend to sort of say it again,
Unknown Speaker 30:03
that I can't I can't be a wife or a girlfriend right now, attention span is only for fighting and martial arts and you talk to me about business or other stuff. I have no idea what you're seeing in my mind is thinking about sparring. It's just not fair to whoever I'm with, of course, and that's why
Unknown Speaker 30:17
a lot of women in our position tend to date other fighters or other athletes or even coaches, you know, and people are like, Oh, that's so bad, but it's like no, you don't know the struggle of having to give 110% to your sport, and then whatever's left over obviously we do have sex drives we do want to be loved we want to be in relationship but it's hard. So the next best thing is is kind of someone who is convenient but also shares the same passion and it tends to be you know, someone in the gym have your Do you prefer to date someone in the scene like MMA scene or would you prefer to date someone disconnected to them may seem
Unknown Speaker 30:58
I have two modes. Okay, so I go through different stages, so I don't know sometimes I'm like yeah, maybe maybe I should just data fighter cuz my jujitsu will get a lot better
Unknown Speaker 31:11
shout out to my boy. Thank you babe.
Unknown Speaker 31:18
Really good, you know, career Hell yeah.
Unknown Speaker 31:21
But then I'm crazy cuz I finished training and I come home and like, I don't like anyone to treat me as a fighter like all my friends you know, like, we go out we're gonna pull like people ask me Oh what sport Do you play and I'm a volleyball player like I don't I don't speak about it because I just detached mentally from it because if I'm all in 24 seven I'm going to drive myself crazy so I just autonomous for act like a normal girl and inside of my sport. I'm, I'm Valerie so I just go through two different moods. I don't know maybe I'll experiment here.
Unknown Speaker 31:54
You have a lot of time and like I just love that you said unless he's really special, I think You sound like the kind of girl who has very high standards and you're not going to change that for anything in life
Unknown Speaker 32:06
don't agree anything. That's awesome.
Unknown Speaker 32:08
You just they and that's it's not just you or me, it's everybody you should you should be with someone who adds value to your life right? They make you happy. They teach you something that that gets us you know like you want
Unknown Speaker 32:20
that's the way my heart went. I don't want to feel like a mom. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 32:25
yeah, I mean I was just gonna say like, if you help me become a better fighter like with technique or you're sparring or helping me go for runs with me. I'm like putty in their hands because that's my passion. That's my dreams are you're helping me achieve my dream. I'm like, Ah, so yeah, my boyfriend's a black belt in jujitsu. It's so funny. You said
Unknown Speaker 32:41
that. Oh, yeah.
Unknown Speaker 32:46
Unknown Speaker 32:47
you know, I'm
Unknown Speaker 32:48
like, I'm having fun and I'm working right.
Unknown Speaker 32:52
I'm getting a lot better.
Unknown Speaker 32:54
Okay, well, okay. So obviously characteristics, you know, you want someone who Who? You know I'm gonna go out on a limb and say someone who adds value to your career who understands your lifestyle but what about physically do you have like you know, tall, dark and handsome Are you like short? Short blonde buff guys like what's your What's your favorite type of guy physically?
Unknown Speaker 33:14
So I usually go for like
Unknown Speaker 33:18
athletes I guess. Yeah, I think athletes and Hall and big doesn't think so yes be able to carry on and big and athletic and you know, something I really look for that's really weird is that the first time a guy asked me out, I never go on a date like to dinner. My first workout is always Okay, come with me into the gym. It's really weird. But I do that because what you see is what you get, you know if you could see me in my environment granya spoke you know, grappling with other guys and you couldn't handle it. You could take it and I feel that you feel my passion. That's what attracts. Yes, you can be part of my team because you understand my passion, you get my vision. You see the future that I see and you understand it, and I really look for that. It's what I look for that connection of, of like that unconditional support like Valerie's gonna be champ.
Unknown Speaker 34:19
That's great. That's like, I'm just picturing like some guys like, you know, like he goes, he's like, babe, I'm gonna take you to this nice dinner and then I'm gonna do this and you're like, put your wrestling shoes on.
Unknown Speaker 34:29
Like, I don't even care like, what type of sport they do, or like, here's like, watch me in my environment. Watch me in my sport. If you could handle it, the fact that I'm not a normal girl who who's gonna stay home all day cleaning your house, that will never be me. You know, this is my career. This is my passion. This comes first and your second and and if you could support a fine if you don't, then you're not the right person.
Unknown Speaker 34:51
Yeah, I mean it. We are let's face it. We are alpha females. You know, we do this sport that's very aggressive, but it also takes a very strong, strong woman mentally and emotionally it's not for the weak hearted. So we tend to go for guys that are alpha males. Would you agree?
Unknown Speaker 35:09
Yes, I love alpha males.
Unknown Speaker 35:12
So, you know, and you can be an alpha male but still be sweet doesn't mean alpha alpha male does not mean asshole. It just means that, you know, you take care of your own shit, you know, and you can handle a strong woman. So that makes a lot of sense. I love that. So, you know, looks but what about characteristics? You know, do you have anything? Like any turn ons or turn offs about guys?
Unknown Speaker 35:37
Just, I like a sexy guy. Who doesn't? Or how to No, no, I know. I know. But like, I like a sexy guy who knows how to handle me if that makes sense. Because I'm like, I don't know. I feel like I need a man who puts me in my place. If that makes sense. Like Valerie, here like I'm not really a decision maker like a guy who will makes decisions. Who has this shit together? Um, I don't know who's all about me and all over me and all for me and my Korean. And
Unknown Speaker 36:09
yeah, awesome. What about deal breakers like for me? I could never do to smoke or cigarettes. You know? Yeah. What about you anything like that kids are?
Unknown Speaker 36:19
I can never date a guy who's obsessed with themselves. narcissistic like 10 times shit and is a fucking loser. Oh my god, I can't I can't wait with the eagle with a guy who was alone with his Eagle. I can do it like I can be in like my apartment and have a guy who's looking himself in the mirror more than I am while I'm getting ready, but that's not normal.
Unknown Speaker 36:46
I don't like that. What do they call that like a pretty boy or like there's a word for it.
Unknown Speaker 36:53
I don't know. I just don't like it. Just kind of like take too much care of himself of like his skin and stuff like that.
Unknown Speaker 37:01
So do you like rugged guys then like you like the beard? I like a man.
Unknown Speaker 37:06
Unknown Speaker 37:09
okay, well you're 22 what's what's the age limit? Like? Are you you? You said you dated older guy. What's too old now?
Unknown Speaker 37:17
Unknown Speaker 37:19
anymore. Okay, you're 22 Would you date a 42 year old guy?
Unknown Speaker 37:24
No, that's too much. Okay, okay. Okay, so we gotta be like under 40 right?
Unknown Speaker 37:29
Yeah. Okay, let's see if
Unknown Speaker 37:31
all the old guys
Unknown Speaker 37:33
that are dating older guys like I don't know. They just know what they're doing me.
Unknown Speaker 37:39
I'm robbing the cradle My boyfriend is three years younger than me so I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 37:43
Both you're both mature and
Unknown Speaker 37:45
yeah, yeah, he's 33 being young. Oh yeah, no you you're gonna at least need to date someone 25 or older cuz guys aren't even know man in my
Unknown Speaker 37:54
life. I like 2525 never again in my life.
Unknown Speaker 37:58
Oh really. You got to be like, over 25 Okay, at least you know that you're
Unknown Speaker 38:02
maybe I just had a bad experience.
Unknown Speaker 38:05
I feel like a lot of dude. I mean, they say men mature slower than women. So, yeah, you're probably better off with dating older guys. Do you have any celebrity crushes? I see everybody posted you as like a woman crush Wednesday. Do you have either like a fighter crush or a celebrity crush?
Unknown Speaker 38:25
You want me to say a fighter cuz?
Unknown Speaker 38:28
I mean, it's just a crush is not saying you're Lego. I worship the guy like my spider crush, just to make you comfortable would be. I used to have I mean, I still do but like, you know, I have a boyfriend now. But like Robbie Lawler. I was like, ooh, Robbie Lawler. Yeah. Yeah, because I'm just like, I love the way he fought like my favorite fight ever is him versus Rory MacDonald. You know, his lips like flapping off. It's like a bloody war. And that's just that alpha male shit we're talking about and just like, oh, like this guy would die in the cage. If he had to. Yeah
Unknown Speaker 39:05
no no for no fighter crush at all.
Unknown Speaker 39:08
Unknown Speaker 39:11
one I don't want
Unknown Speaker 39:12
to say all right tells Elisa celebrity crush you don't have a celebrity crush
Unknown Speaker 39:18
Unknown Speaker 39:20
let me thing
Unknown Speaker 39:23
oh no not really I don't really shoot your
Unknown Speaker 39:25
shot girl maybe he hears this and he's like oh Valerie
Unknown Speaker 39:30
is he's DM me before so shit camera guys are killing us know
Unknown Speaker 39:35
what okay fine after the after the podcast I would it be like Tell me tell me tell me
Unknown Speaker 39:41
all right moving on so you told me about this relationship and now you're really focused. Can I ask it's kind of personal probably but like why exactly did that relationship and it sounds like you're the one that ended it did it have anything to do with your commitment to training and like your focus on your career?
Unknown Speaker 39:58
Yeah those cuz like was a bitch. Honestly. I feel so bad thinking about this because I was so mean and it didn't even notice. But he was just so he was like too good to me if that makes sense. Like, you know, like, he just went above and beyond, like I would walk into a job, you know, and I was on this reality show and he did everything for me at home, took care of my bills, took care of my family, when my sister is a college like he was so good to me. I just felt like I could reciprocate that right now. And like that wasn't, it wasn't my interest, and I wasn't as attracted to him anymore. That makes sense. And I was looking for things elsewhere. And this was also in the beginning my career and I first started receiving attention and stuff and like, I was just like, less mature and I didn't really know how to handle it. But I that relationship had to end like I had to fly on my own and do things on my own. But I still love and adore him. I'm thinking
Unknown Speaker 40:50
most of my life. I love that. You know, you're right, you had to fly on your own. And I remember that feeling. I remember I was in college and I kind of fell out of love with someone and it's such a horrible feeling. Because you don't want to fall out of love and you kind of start feeling like a bad person, but it's just you can't control the way you feel, you know, and I think that, that you did the smartest thing ending it with him like, what if you would have dragged it on for a couple years later? A couple a couple more years, then he be even more crushed, right?
Unknown Speaker 41:17
Yeah, I don't know. I just, it's an it wasn't good for me and more in the moment, and I just was scared to break away from the relationship because he was so good to me. I'm like, Damn, am I ever gonna find a guy who loves me like this? Like, honestly, that man's gonna make a woman extremely happy faces is the most perfect boyfriend I've ever seen. Like, there wasn't one thing that you did wrong on my phone. But
Unknown Speaker 41:43
everyone always thinks that when they break up there I'm never gonna find anyone that loves me like this. Like that's the goatee thought.
Unknown Speaker 41:50
I still don't know. I honestly don't think anyone will ever love me that in conditioning and and he saw the beginning of my career like he saw me for for one whole year. In a bubble like like literally the four walls of my house, just grinding like I didn't even move my apartment is learning jujitsu on my own every single day five hours YouTube this YouTube like learning sweets learning everything trying to catch up with these girls like a fight pro already he saw me with my craziness. I love that.
Unknown Speaker 42:17
I love that Valerie. That's awesome. You know what, but there's gun Don't Don't sell yourself short man, someone right now is listening to this podcast and they're thinking to themselves, that's in dedication. That's a mate that's attractive, you know, just like you want the guy who's the alpha who can put you in your place but you know, a little rugged like, not too pretty. Like there's a guy out there and he's thinking wow, like, I want to meet Valerie. So
Unknown Speaker 42:40
keep grinding girl think about my future husband. I'm like, Are you are you watching me right now? I really think that the day that like I'm also like when I'm in a relationship I'm amazing. Like I get 100% I give above all like everything of me. I give I go above and beyond. To make them feel like I'm a very giving person, I feel like I show my love with giving, like with my family with everything. I'm not a very good listener. Like my signs always in 15 million places. But I show my love and appreciation by giving in
Unknown Speaker 43:16
my own little words. That's cool. Yeah, we talk about love languages on the podcast sometimes and some people give, show their love with gifts. Some people want to spend quality time some people it's affection to person, you know, physical touch, and at least you know your love language. I think that's one of the biggest, not battles, but just like if you know, how you show love and how you appreciate love, and then you get into a relationship like it that's a better start than you know, because it's hard. Communication is like, obviously the number one thing blah, blah, blah. But if you both understand like how you can show love and how you appreciate love, like that's great. So,
Unknown Speaker 43:53
oh, that's another thing. I need a man who's completely confident in themselves like actual confidence. Like I hate insecure men so that's a no Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 44:04
yeah, cuz that comes that's hand in hand with jealousy. Right? And jealousy is just fucking
Unknown Speaker 44:09
Unknown Speaker 44:10
So when you are, you know, let's just say you were on the prowl, right? Are you more of like a? Because you're 22 you're totally the swipe left swipe right generation Do you do online dating? Or is it more like let it happen naturally traditional in person?
Unknown Speaker 44:25
No, I do funding. I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 44:29
Like fun. I don't like I don't do online dating. But like, I know, I've met people here and there that I like, or like, I don't know. I don't know. I'm weird. I don't know. I just, I'm attracted to like, I don't know just voice or like the way a man handles me and I'm like, oh my god. Yeah, you see you got to be in person to do that. And I mean, you obviously probably don't have any moment also, by the way a guy talks like I could tell by Get away a guy messages me his attitude.
Unknown Speaker 45:05
Really nothing gets lost in translation because that, you know, text message.
Unknown Speaker 45:10
Like I have good intuition like I tell like there's a vibe that I feel and I like. So you've
Unknown Speaker 45:16
never been on any, like dating apps or anything like that? No. Okay, so I'm always like, I was never really on dating apps either. So I'm always like, wanting to hear the horror stories because you hear like those catfish stories and all that and All right. Well,
Unknown Speaker 45:32
we're both lucky but
Unknown Speaker 45:33
Unknown Speaker 45:36
you know, you were in love with the former relationship, the guy that you were from 18 to 20. Right.
Unknown Speaker 45:42
I wouldn't say in love. I would say like, that was my, my first real relationship.
Unknown Speaker 45:47
Wow. Cuz my question is gonna be like, do you think you've ever been in love?
Unknown Speaker 45:53
Yeah, okay. Okay, so you guys lost my virginity.
Unknown Speaker 45:59
Alright, y'all Like my whole high school experience was like, four years on and off. Like that guy driving me crazy. And it's funny cuz now he retweets on favorites, my shit. But you were never in a relationship with him? No, but I was in love with.
Unknown Speaker 46:14
Oh man that reminds me of a fucking boy that I dated for a long time and he treated me like dirt and I would do anything he said. And then somewhere along the way, he started treating me like a fucking princess. But I realized by that time, I was like, Oh, I deserve better.
Unknown Speaker 46:28
Yeah, no, I just like he can. Okay, I'm gonna share this with the world. But listen to this. So this guy, like I was so in love with him. I lost my virginity in high school and everything. And like, I wasn't about the Olympics back then. Right. And one day, like one of the last times I spoke to him, he told me that I wasn't going to compete in the Olympics. I was going to be sweeping the floor, the Olympics.
Unknown Speaker 46:52
Unknown Speaker 46:53
resonated with me. Yeah, I still think about that. To this day. Maybe that's why I'm winning fights. Where do you
Unknown Speaker 47:01
shoot his motivation? Okay.
Unknown Speaker 47:04
But now he retweets me he's a fan. Isn't that crazy?
Unknown Speaker 47:07
No, it's not crazy. That's fun. Oh, that's how it goes.
Unknown Speaker 47:11
He's like now he tells people Yeah, she lost her virginity. Oh my god
Unknown Speaker 47:15
Unknown Speaker 47:17
Unknown Speaker 47:19
animal that's his claim to fame
Unknown Speaker 47:22
okay well I'm sorry that happened because I know that feeling where you just like would do anything and like you worship the ground they walk on but they just treat you like crap and it's funny you say that because somebody who who you know I was in that situation with one of the last things he said to me before we broke up was you're going to lose your next fight and it just cut me it dude it just me like It's like he said like, your whole family's gonna die. I was just like, ah, and it hurts cuz he knew you know those people when you know I'm not like this. Like if I'm sad. I don't try to retaliate. I don't say mean things back. But there are a lot of people like that. They want to hurt you back. And am I remember that and so it's funny. It's like, yeah, there are men out there like that. They're gonna they're gonna try to tear you down. And then who cares use that shit as motivation. Like you said, That's That's awesome. Yeah, so he was the guy that you lost your virginity to? I'm assuming it was not magical.
Unknown Speaker 48:20
No, it was terrible.
Unknown Speaker 48:22
Yeah, yeah. What year were you? Were you freshmen sophomore?
Unknown Speaker 48:27
I was a junior,
Unknown Speaker 48:28
Junior. That's pretty good. Yeah. Wait, I was 15. I was a freshman. Oh, wait, wait, wait. So how did you learn about the birds and the bees? You said you have an older sister. I'm assuming her.
Unknown Speaker 48:42
Wait, how did I know about what six birds and the bees? Oh no. I have two younger sisters. And they told you no, no, no, I'm saying I don't have an older sister. Oh, okay. Sorry. I thought you
Unknown Speaker 48:54
had an older sister but I don't know.
Unknown Speaker 48:55
Well, I kind of learned myself.
Unknown Speaker 48:58
I don't know. tv. Or just like kind of paying attention?
Unknown Speaker 49:03
Like to sex?
Unknown Speaker 49:04
Yeah, like your parents didn't have the talk or like, I remember my friends when Oh,
Unknown Speaker 49:08
my parents are awkward. My parents wouldn't talk to me about Taekwondo.
Unknown Speaker 49:12
He only talked to you about Taekwondo. Yeah, I know and my mom is crazy my mom like she doesn't like a guy around my leg sure make my life impossible so he's not in it. Well, you told me that your mom tested for her black belt when she was pregnant so like that says something right there about your mom and and it's fucking literally in your DNA fighting is in your DNA.
Unknown Speaker 49:32
Yes, fighting is in my DNA. People think I got my fighting for my dad. But no, my mom is progressive and my father My mom is crazy. My mom is not there. She would my mom would just standing with a broom and oh my god, my parents beat me up like that the right way. Like they made sure that I had my shit together. I was training hard and I was doing good in school. That's all that mattered. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 49:53
it sounds like they really shaped you. And unfortunately you did have the, the, you know, eating disorder, but Thank goodness you're okay now. But other than that, it seems like they made you into this tough, beautiful warrior girl.
Unknown Speaker 50:06
Yeah, but you know, that's my mom, though, because my dad was just I got obsessed with my shorts and then the big dream and stuff. And he brought my sisters and I into that, then my mom really did a good job of making sure we, the three of us came out feminine and the way like we were able to adventure into different things other than martial arts, because if it was just my dad raising US alone, like we would have no nothing else about the world. That's not to cuando
Unknown Speaker 50:35
Yeah, and you know, there are a lot of people like that. And if you're not, if you don't have that female figure in your life, then you tend to be a little more tomboyish. And it's just, that's just the way it is. But thank goodness, you have your mom and so that's probably where you get your femininity from. Right.
Unknown Speaker 50:49
Yeah, and there's nothing wrong with just being tomboy, you know, but my mom is my mom has always loved like my mom's dressed me always like yesterday I had a photo shoot all day and I was so sad. She wasn't there for you. She goes with me to all my shoots everything I've done from when I was little like, my mom has always she's always seen that picture for me dressed me with an elegance, you know, and I get that from my mom. She always reminds me Valerie, stay elegant, like, be yourself. You know, she never lets me fall off from who I am and who she raised me to be. That's awesome. I love that. So
Unknown Speaker 51:21
you told me about your, your virginity story. And that was before fighting but now that you are a Professional MMA fighter, do I ask all the guests this? Do you believe in that kind of no sex before a fight? I think it's a myth. But do you do that? Oh, Oh, hell no. And that has been the consensus here on sex violence is that no one abstains during fight camp?
Unknown Speaker 51:46
Oh, I don't know. either. I feel like oh my god, I feel like I'm male driven bugs bad. Like, I don't know. I feel like I train better and I train harder. Like if there's a hot guy in the gym or something like proof like it But I've been like them the whole life.
Unknown Speaker 52:02
No, and that's not bad. You know, whatever you use as motivation. That's and I feel like female fighters we have higher sex drives, but you know, I don't. That's what I think and all the girls that have been on the show, and I've got I've been in the sport for many years now. And I'm like, yeah, we pretty much have the same sex drive as men. So
Unknown Speaker 52:22
well. Why cuz when we, when we train I just saw strong is higher, right?
Unknown Speaker 52:27
Yeah, like, you know, science. You know, literally, that's literally why, you know, we we don't have to wonder why it's, I believe we have higher testosterone. And that's, you know, that's why we have higher sex drives. So you're aggressive in the cage. Do you think that you that translate into the bedroom? Or are you would you consider yourself a little bit more submissive? like you'd like the guy to take over once you get into the bedroom?
Unknown Speaker 52:48
Oh, my God, I could be both like, I could act very submissive, like very fragile, but then sometimes I'd like to be in control and like seduce
Unknown Speaker 52:57
Mm Hmm, yeah, yeah, it's fun. They both rose. Yeah. Okay. I'm the same way. I like that answer. So has anyone ever asked you to do something like too freaky or weird or like, like any any weird sex stories that you want to share with us like this one time?
Unknown Speaker 53:14
Unknown Speaker 53:17
Oh, not really. Yeah, no. normal stuff.
Unknown Speaker 53:23
Okay, well, is that time for the lightning sex round?
Unknown Speaker 53:33
I told you listen to an episode girl just just to be ready. But are you familiar familiar with how the lightning round works? Yes. Okay. So I'm gonna tell you something. And all you got to do is say yes or no, no, like, maybe. Okay, you're ready. Okay, good. All right. Dirty talking bed. Yes or no? Yes. spanker like to be spanked bank.
Unknown Speaker 53:56
Yeah, I like it. All right, fighting
Unknown Speaker 54:00
Yeah chokyi Yeah, threesomes No. Do you watch porn? No. Any foot fetish? No body fluid fetish? No. bonded like ropes or blindfold.
Unknown Speaker 54:15
Yeah, maybe role playing. Yes.
Unknown Speaker 54:19
But stuff on you or a partner. Wait, what? But stuff? Are you? Do you use sex toys? No. ever been to a sex club? No. Are you a lingerie lover? Yes. All right. That's it. painless. Did I do bad? I do. You did? Awesome. I'm pretty sure everyone's giving you an A plus on that. That's good. Okay, the last little I guess game we have is called Fuck, marry. Kill.
Unknown Speaker 55:00
One Mary one
Unknown Speaker 55:01
kill one go. I think we're done. We're done here. And do you know how to play? Oh?
Unknown Speaker 55:08
Go go go. Okay, don't kill me. First of all I have a creative associates shout out to Dan and pat Kenny.
Unknown Speaker 55:17
I know what's coming.
Unknown Speaker 55:18
Yeah. They're my homies. They always helped me put these together. So you got to choose to fuck one marry one kill one. I'm gonna give you three names. Okay. And this is the Bella Torre version, so don't kill me. All right. Hey, Dylan danis Ryan, Ryan Bader and Michael Chandler. Go.
Unknown Speaker 55:38
Unknown Speaker 55:46
gonna play Jeopardy music Hold on. Okay, so get on that.
Unknown Speaker 55:54
Unknown Speaker 55:55
you know what they look like right?
Unknown Speaker 55:57
Yeah, I thought I thought on chatters card.
Unknown Speaker 56:00
Sq Okay, so we fucking hammer
Unknown Speaker 56:08
mainly marry tender. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense because he's a good fighter and stuff and you
Unknown Speaker 56:15
champ babies when he was
Unknown Speaker 56:18
Unknown Speaker 56:21
Unknown Speaker 56:26
I don't know, I have nothing but kill on the other one.
Unknown Speaker 56:29
Ryan Bader. Okay. And then the other being in Dillon danis All right. He's super happy right now.
Unknown Speaker 56:39
Okay, that was that was painless, right.
Unknown Speaker 56:43
All right. So now time for fan questions cross.
Unknown Speaker 56:52
I'm really excited because people were just like I had. I got a lot of questions
Unknown Speaker 56:58
and the same thing with my three Fuck man kill.
Unknown Speaker 57:02
No, you you that's it was fuck. Very cool. Now we're just getting on to real fan questions these people have said, What would I have said hey, hey girl, I'm the host
Unknown Speaker 57:13
No, but I'll say I for sure would.
Unknown Speaker 57:17
I would bang Michael Chandler I would kill Dylan danis and Mary Ryan Bader Ryan Bader was really nice to me. We fought on the same UFC card before he went over to bellator. And I was cutting weight in the sauna in Germany, actually. And I was like, you know, just like one more pound but that last pounder just like, just killed me now, you know? And he was over there. I think he'd already actually made weight. And he like walked by He's like, come on, champion got this. And I'm just like, Uh huh. And he's like, I'm gonna stay in here until you make weight. And so he stayed in there longer with me and like my coaches and stuff and I was just like, Oh, no, I'm like, all sucked up. And
Unknown Speaker 57:55
yeah, he's a good guy. So yeah, so,
Unknown Speaker 57:57
okay, I'm sorry, Ryan.
Unknown Speaker 58:00
I'm very sorry because I know the villain and I know Chandler
Unknown Speaker 58:05
Yeah, I mean I'm sure the other guys are nice guys too but yeah. All right fan questions so you ready? Go Okay, at Dan vandal 12 wants to know what's the one thing that will always turn you on
Unknown Speaker 58:21
continent's? Yes Good answer,
Unknown Speaker 58:24
but not but not too cocky like the pretty boy.
Unknown Speaker 58:27
No no no there's a huge difference between cocky and confident this is true.
Unknown Speaker 58:32
Oh, this is a good one and I have to speak Spanish so Do not laugh at me. At a it's me 502 wants to know, as a Latina mixed martial artists synthes K to position as important day. I don't know if I said that right.
Unknown Speaker 58:48
Now like you think a kimono Latinas nipples is young importante um, yeah, you're Europeans. Okay. They're super important the Boca sala onancock wanna ma He Shinto k gave was Salida Miami within a thought up Boyle de Miami que bueno Latino como Latina Murphy Riley It was super emotional
Unknown Speaker 59:11
Alessia Nomad Latina
Unknown Speaker 59:13
to know what you said with us Oh no no no
Unknown Speaker 59:16
that's my only my my friend over here
Unknown Speaker 59:19
this is awesome only the only the Spanish speakers will get that word I love that okay so don't even okay at Rice loving Asian has funny name says Do you have any pre fight rituals that you do before you walk out to the fight?
Unknown Speaker 59:35
Oh yeah do so before my fight um, I listened to a subset Cuban music you know and against a little bit he is I feel like I'm in my element like I let go and and free and. And then I pray a lot. I pray a lot a lot. I prayed up. Like my family who's passed away. My mom lost a baby two they were three girls but my mom lost a baby at six months and he was a boy He would have been my brother. So I prayed a baby Angel Allah and I just prayed to some guardians and I feel like I have over me and and I asked them for for peace and you know allow the the better man to win and act on that train harden deserves them more to give it to them.
Unknown Speaker 1:00:17
I love that I loved the thing about you. You said it a couple times. Now I feel like you have this sense of never forgetting anyone who helped you get where you're at so much that you are thinking about your brother that could have been and I'm like, Oh my god, you're such a fucking sweetheart. I can tell
Unknown Speaker 1:00:34
that it's like it's mind blowing to me. I would have had, I would have had a brother martial artist, you know, it breaks my heart, but I know.
Unknown Speaker 1:00:43
Yeah, that's awesome. I love that. I love that you're very easier face to give you confidence before the fight. All right at Lexie Jolie says what's your biggest piece of advice for young women in MMA in MMA like me, so I guess Lexie Jolie is a MMA fighter
Unknown Speaker 1:00:59
nine big piece of advice would be basically to never let any man whether it be a coach or a training player, anybody control you in this sport or tell you when you can and you can be if I would have listened to the first coaches I had when I started this sport, I would still be an amateur. Right? So just trust your intuition. Trust what you're meant to do, you know, oh, and, and spar hard. A be a big thing I have for all girls is when you're sparring with guys, you know, kick them hard. So that they hit you back hard and they give you that, that intensity that you need in a cage because I can't stand it like this is one of my biggest, um, like, my biggest something that bothers me is I want to spar with a guy and he doesn't hit me hard. Like, I'm like, yo, you're wasting my time and you think I'm a joke, right? Because you're like you're wasting my time and we're not training hard to get it and like I could benefit you also, right? So I just say kick them hard until they hit you back and and just look at them like another I love that. Yeah,
Unknown Speaker 1:02:01
there's no there shouldn't be genders in the gym. It should be. I'm a fighter. You're a fighter. And you know, obviously with the exception of like, you know, a pro heavyweight guy knocking you out, you want the guy to respect you enough to push you you need to be pushed in the in the room so yeah, I get I feel you grow.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:19
But if I were sparring hard
Unknown Speaker 1:02:23
if we're fighting we're fucking fighting.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:26
At Ken wickman says, always this question would you ever make an only fans
Unknown Speaker 1:02:31
know oh my god.
Unknown Speaker 1:02:36
You know, let me tell you something down. So annoying. I really don't like that one night. I
Unknown Speaker 1:02:40
don't know. And it just got so popular this year because the quarantine and so many people are doing I feel like society, especially the men, they see an attractive woman in the who's you know, famous or popular. And they think oh, maybe she's gonna make one I'm like, No, it doesn't mean that every person who has you know X amount of followers is going to start it only fans.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:00
And let me tell you, like girls make money on that thing. But like, that's not the type of money I'm making. I'm making hard working money and and nothing's changing that. I love that. That's awesome.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:10
Okay, last fan question at ravey underscore artist says what's, what do you like best about yourself?
Unknown Speaker 1:03:18
Um, what I like best about this sort of.
Unknown Speaker 1:03:22
I feel like what I like best about myself is that I always, um, I always know that I think I'm right. But like when my family tells me I'm wrong, I'm wrong. there for the most part, I always keep in mind what's right and wrong. And I always do what's best. What I feel like I trust my intuition. And I just feel like what I like about myself is that I, I haven't made anything stupid. Like I'm very cautious with my decisions I'm making right on the beginning of my career. And like, I don't let anyone change that. So it's something I don't like I say, No, I'm not doing that. You know, I don't let anyone influence If that makes sense,
Unknown Speaker 1:04:01
Yes, it does. I love that. And like I keep saying, it's just you're 22 but it's like god damn girl. Where'd you get this wise life wisdom from? You know?
Unknown Speaker 1:04:08
I don't I don't know. I just think my family's crazy. So I grew up looking at things I didn't like and what I did like, and
Unknown Speaker 1:04:16
yeah, you got to grow fast when your family's a little crazy. Definitely.
Unknown Speaker 1:04:19
My mom was sick. My mom was sick. So I was on mom to my two younger sisters for four years while I was in high school. So maybe that's it. That's a mature very quick.
Unknown Speaker 1:04:29
And you know what you said? You said it. You're like, Don't Don't let anyone influence you. because no one's no one knows what you've been through except for you. And it sounds like you've been through a fucking lot girl and I'm so happy that you channeled it into a way to be happy and to get your frustrations out and to market yourself and make money and be successful. You're killing it. Who do you want to see here on the show next?
Unknown Speaker 1:04:56
Unknown Speaker 1:04:57
yeah, if you could hear anyone, anyone.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:00
You know one of my good friends Gillian Roberts Julie right that's her name we need to have savage savage and I have gone out together and savage has been she's lit. Okay.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:13
Julian come on the show. Okay, and that's that's it that's it for the show girl you killed it. I think that I mean I'm a new fan I already was like, you know I was a fan of your fighting style but now I feel like I'm a fan of you as a person.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:26
No girl, I'm a fan of you. I'm I was super excited for the show because I feel like if I'm on call,
Unknown Speaker 1:05:31
let's call her daddy.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:33
It's on a barstool sports. It's kind of it's more like a sex oriented show that I like the conditions fighting and sexuality and that's just like those talking about their love life. That's awesome.
Unknown Speaker 1:05:45
They actually I think you should probably listen to the podcast that inspired me to do this podcast. It's called guys we fucked and it's to comedian chicks and they talk about sex and they have on, you know, like a sex therapist. They have a lot of comedians on so it's extra funny amount of comedians. Are you guys but I'd like talking about sex and violence you know that makes that sets us apart. We are sexual women but we also do this awesome sport
Unknown Speaker 1:06:08
sport called MMA. Yes, we do. And it's the dopest sport in the world. Right around the Hell yeah.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:16
It's the fastest growing sport in the world. Yeah, girl keep trading card. I really, really, really am rooting for you. Now. I can't wait to see you fight again. And yeah, just thank you so much for coming on the show. Talk to you soon. Okay.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:27
Yeah. Thank you so much for having me. This was so much fun. And you know, I hope to see you soon.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:32
All right. Bye, girl. Bye.
Unknown Speaker 1:06:55
Your Consumer Law perfection.
Unknown Speaker 1:07:19
Wow, I am super impressed with the maturity and wear with all of our shoes. I mean, I keep saying it she's only 20 years old, but she just seems to have her priorities in check and on the path to a championship. You know, it's it's very early to say that but that mindset at a young age is hard to come by. And I think a lot of us even myself can learn a lot from her. I mean, we're all over here just trying to stay focused on whatever we got going on right and not get distracted by all the negativity in life, whether it's social media or otherwise. So take care of yourselves guys. disconnect from social media when you can let the negative comments roll off like water and Keep Swimming. Thank you guys for tuning in again. And if this was your first episode, tune in again next week, we'll have some awesome guests. Maybe we'll have Gillian Roberts like Valerie suggested. Also, if you like this podcast, please help it grow, tell someone share link, whatever. And if you do a rating and review, just take a screenshot of that, send it to our Instagram at sex and violence with rebel girl. And guess what? We will send you a free sticker free 99 guys, I don't even pay for the stamps myself. So please do that. And a special shout out to all the people that make this possible. Like our audio engineer DJs or Premiere Pro at DJ zol tomorrow can studio at tomorrow kids official. And again, you can find us on Instagram at sex and violence with rebel girl lilla sex and violence with rebel girl and our backup page at sex and violence rebel girl to myself at Ashley MMA. And subscribe to this podcast and tune in next week to hear more tales of sex and via
Transcribed by https://otter.ai